The Top 10: Unexpected Middle Names
From Charles Huffam Dickens to Elton Hercules John: the lesser-known interpolations
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Your support makes all the difference.We’ve had invented middle initials, now we have middle names, real and fictional. This list was started by Maggie Lavan, who nominated Donald Fauntleroy Duck. Special prize to David Mills for this exchange: “What was Gladstone’s middle name?” “Ewart.” “I said, ‘What was Gladstone’s middle name?’”
1. Charles John Huffam Dickens. “Charles Huffam Dickens is a name worthy of his own creation,” said Graham Kirby.
2. Jerome Clapp Jerome, who changed it to Jerome Klapka Jerome, after Hungarian general Gyorgy Klapka. Thanks to Matthew Randall. Jerome’s elder sister was called Blandina, of course.
3. Robert Frederick Zenon Geldof. John Peters also nominated Rutherford Birchard Hayes and Warren Gamaliel Harding.
4. Richard Tiffany Gere. His mother’s maiden name. Nominated by Dan Jackson and No Ordinary Cat.
5. Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. But of course, George Bosanko.
6. Nicholas If-Christ-had-not-died-for-thee-thou-hadst-been-damned Barebone (or Barbon), a pioneer of fire insurance and son of Praise-God Barebone (after whom the Barebone’s Parliament of 1653 was named). Thanks to Alan Robertson, who also nominated Wile Ethelbert Coyote and William Topaz McGonagall.
7. Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso. Thanks to No Ordinary Cat.
8. Elton Hercules John. “Though of course, the whole thing is made up,” said Robert Kaye.
9. James Tiberius Kirk. Boldly nominated by Jonathan Law.
10. John Ronald Reuel Tolkien. Thanks to Robert Boston.
Honourable mentions for an ancestor of Iain McNeil’s wife’s, born 18 April 1912 and named Mary Titanic A – although the ship sank on 15 April. David G Leddy said his father was christened George Heir Leddy. “Why? We don’t know. He wasn’t even the eldest son.”
Burn Marks nominated Arsenal goalkeeper Bob Primrose Wilson; No Ordinary Cat also suggested Robert Andrew Scarborough Ferris from The Likely Lads; Dan Jackson wanted Emile William Ivanhoe Heskey; Andrew Waite asked about Portsmouth Football Club fan and Petersfield bookshop owner, John Portsmouth Football Club Westwood. Robert Kaye pointed out that Williams Hague and Clinton both had Jefferson as their middle names; and Robert Boston also nominated Reginald Iolanthe Perrin.
Next week: index entries, such as this one, featuring a middle name: “Marcos, Imelda Romualdez: bulletproof brassiere,” from The Marcos Dynasty, by Sterling Seagrave.
Coming soon: Scottish words. Ruth Davidson, leader of Scottish Tories, has already suggested gallus, stooshie and hoachin’.
Your suggestions please, and ideas for future Top 10s, to me on Twitter, or by email to top10@independent.co.uk
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