Take Me Out was not brainless, vapid or sexist – as a former contestant, it was the best dating TV show we had

Power to the girls who will continue to flirt in a way that is true to themselves – as I did, in front of millions of people

The lights are going off on the nation's favourite dating show, Take Me Out. After 11 years embedded in our collective hearts, spawning eight weddings and six babies, the news has sent waves of sadness through the social media realm.

No likey!

After all, the Paddy McGuinness-fronted show has become a Saturday night staple and even spawned an ITV2 spin-off, a success that few television shows achieve.

Amidst the grief has come inevitable finger-pointing. Many people claimed the show’s cancellation has long been on the cards, given the seemingly outdated format of guys trying to woo stereotypically vapid women.

As someone who was part of Paddy’s final flirty thirty in 2019, I can say that these views are completely misguided. Far from being outdated, Take Me Out’s format gave the show a universal commonality. It was positioned as a family-friendly dating show, which you could watch with grandma or grandpa, before you got ready for a night out with your friends – ready to use the contestants' one-liners forming the inspiration for chatting up a hottie in the club.

Unlike Love Island, this wasn’t a space limited to the Instagrammable, bikini-clad model with 100k followers – Take Me Out contestants were relatable women, and reflected the diverse variety of sizes, shapes, personalities, styles, ambitions and accents that real women have. The show also welcomed women from almost every corner of the UK, from Scunthorpe to Barnsley.

This diversity drove my ambition to appear on the show. Growing up as a British Indian, I often found media portrayals of my fellow South Asians to be alienating as they usually consisted of suppressed women hiding their personalities and passions from overbearing, strict families (Jess, from Bend it Like Beckham), who had no ambitions for their daughters other than an arranged marriage (Manjula, from The Simpsons). It was a far cry from the upbringing myself and my fellow South Asian pals enjoyed, which celebrated both Western and Indian culture and encouraged us to pursue both our dreams and the men of our choice.

During the filming of Take Me Out, the production team enthusiastically encouraged the flirty thirty to be true to ourselves. We were asked to bring our own wardrobes and work with the glam team to develop our own hairstyle and looks. Our personalities came to the fore as we filmed one episode every night, across a space of eight days, in front of a live audience. We had no idea who was coming down the lift, so all our reactions were natural and unscripted! Far from being brainless bimbos, we had to rely on our quick wit and banter to bag ourselves a date to the sunny Isle of Fernandos.

I mixed bright pink suits, bold coloured jumpsuits and sassy one-liners to reflect the independent and free-thinking personality that is typical of my culture: as far removed from the noughties’ style depictions of suppressed South Asian women that was reflected on screen.

Whilst I didn’t bag a date, I did meet 30 women who I’ve formed some fab, lifelong friendships with. We all got along like a treat, forming a sisterhood during filming, which has continued to flourish – even 15 months after filming. As the relationships formed on the show came and went, the bond formed between myself and the lovely ladies was completely natural: after all, we spent every hour together across a period of 11 days (well, those of us not lucky enough to bag a date to Fernandos).

Primetime UK television will not be the same without our Saturday night guilty pleasure, that’s for sure. Yes, we may still have Love Island taking up a massive chunk of our viewing time, but it won’t allow us to witness a man come down a lift dancing to Mysterious Girl (I still won’t be getting down in the club to that!).

Never again will we see the Isle of Fernando’s form the setting of a good or bad date. And most of all we will never hear the historical phrase “No likey, no lighty”.

It’s goodbye to Take Me Out.

But here’s to more power for the gals who aren’t afraid to put themselves out there in the sometimes scary dating landscape, and will continue to flirt in a way that is true to themselves – even if it’s not in front of two million people, like I did!