Why I’ve had enough of ‘WFH’ and can’t wait to get back to the office

Having weighed up the pros and cons, Ryan Coogan has chosen to hang up his dressing gown in favour of a suit and tie – and a terrible commute

Who is your boss more likely to give a big project to: the guy he sees every day and knows by name, or the guy who only exists conceptually? (iStockphoto)

My first three jobs were, in order: running a carnival game on Blackpool pier that was specifically designed to rip off customers, dinner lady at a posh school, and dinner lady at a really, really bad school. Each required me to be on my feet for 10 hours a day, paid less than the minimum wage, and carried with it the threat of serious bodily harm (either from the usual perils of working in a kitchen, or from angry customers who realised those bottles weren’t going down no matter how hard they threw that ball).

If you’d have told me then – or during many jobs I’ve had in the intervening years – that I’d eventually be doing most of my work while sat at home in my dressing gown, I’d probably assume that future me had won the lottery, or rescued some manner of magical, wish-granting fish. In fact, that’s been my life for the past couple of years, ever since I started making the majority of my income from freelancing, and it’s left me less anxious, and more financially secure than I have been in my entire life… so why am I about to pack it all in and head right back to the office?

Yes, despite getting up every day at the crack of five-minutes-before-work, and doing most of my daily tasks while wearing Spider-Man pajamas and watching reruns of Nineties wrestling, I’ve decided to climb down from this veritable Mt Olympus and move right into the heart of London, where I’ll waste hours of every day being suffocated on the Underground and have to get all my nutrients from Pret a Manger.

Does that make me a masochist? Well, maybe. But there’s a good reason for swapping Netflix for awkward coworker small talk (beyond the pain I so richly deserve). The fact is, when you aren’t a physical presence in the office, it can massively hold you back in your career.

That isn’t just me being paranoid, by the way – while it’s something most remote workers probably suspect is already the case, some companies have already started to adopt this stance as official policy. According to Business Insider, tech company Dell recently announced that employees who work fully remotely will potentially be passed over for promotions, circulating a memo among staff which reads: “For remote team members, it is important to understand the trade-offs: Career advancement, including applying to new roles in the company, will require a team member to reclassify as hybrid onsite."

The policy is a complete 180 from the company’s position just a few years ago, when CEO Michael Dell wrote on LinkedIn: "If you are counting on forced hours spent in a traditional office to create collaboration and provide a feeling of belonging within your organization, you’re doing it wrong."

Dell’s policy on remote working may seem wildly unfair, but part of me respects them for formalising something I’ve suspected since I transitioned to fully remote work in 2021. Career advancement isn’t just something that comes from perseverance and a good work ethic. Most of the time those big opportunities are just that – opportunities, that can come out of nowhere, and taking advantage of them is usually just a matter of being the right person, at the right time, in the right place.

Who is your boss more likely to give a big project to: the guy he sees every day and knows by name, or the guy who conceptually only exists to him as a series of emails and Slack messages on his laptop? Who feels more like a member of the team: the guy on Zoom, or the guy sitting in the room?

Is that fair? No, but if you live your life according to the way things should be rather than the way things actually are, you’re going to find yourself disappointed very quickly. Jobs are a complicated network of social and political interactions, and it’s a lot easier to guide those interactions when you’re there in person.

There are other upsides, too. As much as I love writing and editing from the comfort of my couch, I’d be lying if I said my health hadn’t taken a beating from all the snacking and Buffy marathons. Do you know what really helps cut through the monotony of work? A sandwich. You know what helps even more? Four sandwiches.

It would also be nice to go for a pint with my colleagues on a Friday. One huge downside of remote working is that there’s not much opportunity – a reason – to socialise. Your day starts when you open your laptop, it ends when you close it, and your lunch break happens in your own living room. Sure, I don’t need to be friends with the people I work with, but it’s very weird to interact with people every single day and never once say “hey, do you want to go and do something that isn’t this?”

The culture of remote work has a huge number of upsides, and I’m glad that some people benefit from it as much as they do. God knows I’d rather have been working from bed than rigging an illegal ring toss game when I was 17, and I envy the people who will use these opportunities to reclaim a little more of their social lives, and spend a little less on things like food and travel.

But right now, for me, trading in my hoodie for a suit and tie isn’t just a meaningless formality – it’s necessary for my future career advancement. I’m sure I’ll miss catching up on TV, and I can already feel myself getting sick of those Tube rides, but if it means more job security and opportunities, it’ll be worth it.