Pesky things always come in tens
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Your support makes all the difference.Ten London attractions which no Londoner can imagine any visitor in his right mind wanting to go to:
The Changing of the Guard
Hamley's
Carnaby Street
The Tower of London
Leicester Square
Oxford Street
Starlight Express
London Bridge
221b Baker Street
Foyle's
Ten colours never offered by any paint-maker's catalogue:
Earl Grey
Capability Brown
Mood Indigo
Olympic Gold
Consolation Bronze
Seville Orange
Gretna Green
Penny Black
Edmund White
Forever Amber
Ten objects commonly left sticking to the inside or outside of cars which no longer have any practical use, and indeed whose very existence has probably been forgotten by the owner:
Sign saying BABY ON
BOARD
Garfield
Furry cube
Sign saying MY OTHER
CAR IS A ...
Parking stickers which go
up and down with the driver's window inside the door until one day they never come back up again
Comic Relief Day tomato
Name of dealer or garage
where car was bought
Sticker bought at Longleat
Sign inciting you to join a rugby club you have never
heard of
Sticker telling you that if you are close enough to read this you are too close
Ten books, works or compositions which have become famous but whose authors we can almost never remember the name of:
The Adventures of Baron
Munchausen
The Swiss Family Robinson
Mary Poppins
Waltzing Matilda
La Marseillaise
Heidi
Charlie's Aunt
Onward Christian Soldiers
Lorna Doone
Pinocchio
Ten things commonly said to belong to the devil:
Devil's beef tub
Devil's elbow
Hell's teeth
A diabolical liberty
Hell's angels
A snowball in hell
Hell's bells
Devilish bad luck
Devilled kidneys
The hindmost
Ten things sometimes mistakenly thought to have been invented by and named after a Scotsman:
Macrame
Macassar oil
Maccabees
Macaroni
Machismo
Macrobiotics
Macaw
Macon wine
Machete
Machicolations
Ten products whose names seem to have absolutely no connection with the nature of the product:
Cherry Blossom shoe
polish
Wild Woodbine cigarettes
Imperial Leather soap
Kiwi shoe polish
Famous Grouse whisky
Tio Pepe ["Uncle Joe"]
sherry
Penguin books
Camel cigarettes
Robin starch
Mars bar
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