Would we be hearing about ‘alcohol problems’ if Nicola Bulley was a man?

It doesn’t matter what the crime is – if a woman is a victim, she’s bound to be responsible for her own downfall

Charlotte Proudman
Thursday 16 February 2023 16:02 GMT
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Ex-detective Martyn Underhill says police have 'destroyed' Nicola Bulley's reputation

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Nicola Bulley’s menopause and alcohol intake may have nothing to do with her going missing, but they have everything to do with the police’s continued female victim-blaming.

In a time when trust in the police is at an all-time low, and their treatment of women is under a microscope, Lancashire Police decided to issue a statement yesterday saying they wanted to put an end to public speculation about Bulley’s vulnerabilities. In what can only be described as a grave error of judgment, Lancashire Police told the entire world that Bulley is menopausal and has “alcohol issues”. Rather than calming the situation down, the police added further fuel to the speculation fire. It looks like the police are deflecting attention away from criticisms of their own police investigation and their failure to locate Bulley.

As if Bulley’s disappearance wasn’t already harrowing enough for her family and friends, the police seem to have insinuated that she is somehow to blame for going missing, leaving people asking whether Bulley was mentally unstable and therefore she should be written off as another “mad woman”. It is not clear how the police are justifying such a serious invasion of Bulley’s privacy, which could be extremely harmful, especially for her safety. This would never have happened if Ms Bulley was a man.

Bulley’s partner Paul Ansell, 44, is said to be understandably “frustrated” with the police over their investigation. He is also said to have been “appalled” after the force’s failure to respond to his request to hold a joint press conference last week.

I am angry too – and so are MPs and women’s rights activists. We are all angry and frustrated. What makes matters even worse is that the titillation about Bulley’s disappearance has seen two people arrested on suspicion of sending malicious communications to local councillors over her disappearance.

Sexism and victim blaming by the UK police force is nothing new. In the 1970s, when the Yorkshire Ripper Peter Sutcliffe murdered 13 women, the police deemed certain victims innocent, but others dispensable. Survivors’ accounts were ignored – and women blamed for drinking or going out alone or being in the sex trade. This sexism threw the police off the trail of the Yorkshire Ripper and cost more women their lives.

Various forms of victim blaming are still used by the police. For example, when Sarah Everard was abducted and murdered by a serving police officer in London, following her disappearance, the Metropolitan Police advised women to “take responsibility” for their own safety by avoiding walking alone at night. This advice was widely criticised for putting the onus on women to protect themselves, rather than holding men accountable for violence against women.

More recently, when Owami Davies, a student nurse from London, went missing in the summer of 2022, police published reports that she “may be using alcohol to self-medicate”. However, was found looking “in good health… and not currently in the vulnerable state that we were led to believe she was in at the start of her disappearance”. When the police link a missing woman to their alcohol intake, the underlying tone is blameworthy.

Women going through menopause are constantly undermined and pathologised in society. It is another way for society to refuse to take women seriously. To disclose this level of detail on a missing person’s private life, seemingly with no evidence that this will assist in finding her, is appalling.

As highlighted by psychologist, Dr Jessica Taylor in Why Women are Blamed For Everything, we see the police and the media blame women for the abuse inflicted on them, which is harmful because it shifts responsibility away from the perpetrator and projects it onto the victim. It implies that the victim somehow brought violence or harm on themselves and it can discourage victims from coming forward and seeking help.

Women are often subjected to harmful stereotypes and attitudes that blame them for their own victimisation, such as the belief that women who dress provocatively are somehow “asking for it”. The Crown Prosecution Service have published guidance on rape myths and stereotypes to discourage the blaming of rape victims. Yet, in this case, Bulley, a woman who has gone missing is described as “suffering with menopause and alcohol issues”.

It seems we even need guidance on “women missing” tropes. These harmful attitudes result in a culture that is hostile to victims of gender-based violence.

It doesn’t matter what the crime is, if a woman is a victim, she’s bound to be responsible for her own downfall.

Dr Charlotte Proudman is a barrister specialising in violence against women and girls and a junior research fellow at Queens’ College, Cambridge

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