Keir Starmer’s ‘five missions’ speech: what he said – and what he really meant

Our chief political commentator analyses the algorithms that produced the Labour leader’s speech in Manchester

What Keir Starmer said: I do believe Britain needs a clearer sense of purpose. That the way we run our country can become more like a brilliant sports team pursuing victory. That government can be driven forward by clear, focused objectives, and that this approach is vital for Britain to get its confidence, its hope and its future back.

What he really meant: I am going to be clear and I am going to be focused. I am going to use the words “clear” and “focused” a lot.

What he said: That’s what I’m here to set out today. How a new ‘mission-driven’ Labour government will end ‘sticking plaster’ politics. And in doing so, get Britain back on its feet.

What he meant: I am clear that a Labour government will be driven by its mission. I am focused on trying to find out what this could possibly mean.

What he said: I will never accept that this country is destined for decline. That our best days belong to the past. Success is all around us - it just needs direction.

What he meant: Everything is going swimmingly. It’s just that no one will believe it unless you have me to sell it to you. You need Conservative policies with a Labour prime minister.

What he said: All around the world, countries are gearing up for an almighty race for the opportunities of tomorrow. Britain must be on the start line – not back in the changing room tying its laces.

What he meant: Britain must tie its trainers together on the starting line, not in the changing room, because then we wouldn’t be able to walk to the starting line.

What he said: It’s easy to blame it all on the Tories but some of these problems go back decades.

What he meant: A lot of it is Tony Blair’s fault.

What he said: We’ll modernise central government so it becomes dynamic, agile, strong and, above all, focused.

What he meant: Let me be clear and focused: I believe in big government.

What he said: Mission-driven government.

What he meant: Big government, high taxes.

What he said: A relentless focus on a clear set of priorities. An answer to the widespread call to ‘fix the fundamentals’. A long-term plan to unlock our pride and purpose. A profound statement of intent.

What he meant: Sometimes I will say “focus” first and then “clear”. Just to vary it a bit. Deep words. Fundamental words. Long-term words. Profound words.

What he said: In some ways, it’s a simple idea. Every business around the world – every organisation – has a strategy. A nation needs one too. A plan, a framework, a compass - that acts as a guide for everything we do.

What he meant: Everyone has a plan until they get smacked in the mouth.

What he said: Five national missions. Each one laser-targeted on the complex problems which drive our crises ... Ambitions that won’t be overtaken by the future.

What he meant: My last list of 10 pledges for the leadership election was unfortunately overtaken by the future, but these five won’t be, because I have learned to avoid saying anything specific.

What he said: Ambitions … that raise our sights and, at first glance, seem too bold, invite a sharp intake of breath, a question – can this really be done?

What he meant: No.

What he said: I’m already talking to CEOs, investors, entrepreneurs, unions, energy workers about how we get this done. The conversation always starts with a shake of the head: “This is a bit much, Keir. Clean electricity by 2030 will be going some.”

What they meant: “This is not physically possible within six years.”

What he said: Let me spell it out – if growth over the last 13 years had been as strong as under the last Labour government, we would have £40bn extra to spend on schools and the NHS without a single extra penny in tax. Britain needs to create more wealth, needs to be more competitive – it’s that simple.

What he meant: If growth is higher, governments can spend more money. I understand economics.

What he said: For 13 years there’s been no plan, no urgency, and no one with the courage to do the hard yards that will change who growth is for and where it comes from.

What he meant: Apart from Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng. Their dash for growth was the right idea but it was scuppered by Marxist wreckers in the trading rooms of the City of London.

What he said: We need growth from the grassroots – a new model.

What he meant: Chauncey Gardiner had the right idea – “As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.”

What he said: I look at a problem like our asylum system – and yes, it needs a solution. It’s incredible the government doesn’t have a plan. That they won’t match our plans to set-up a dedicated NCA unit to deal with this. More specialist officers, working every day to take down the gangs and to reach out across to the Channel to countries who share this challenge.

What he meant: Hard to believe that the government hasn’t thought of setting up a dedicated unit, hiring more border staff and doing a deal with the French government. If only they realised how easy it was to stop the boats.

What he said: Tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime – you’ve heard it before, but it’s right!

What he meant: It was Gordon Brown’s slogan.

What he said: These missions will form the backbone of the Labour manifesto. The pillars of the next Labour government.

What he meant: Clear about metaphors and focused on mixing them.

What he said: If we’re going to make it work it will need a totally new mindset.

What he meant: Lobotomies will be available on the NHS.

What he said: I’m not concerned about whether investment or expertise comes from the public or private sector – I just want to get the job done.

What he meant: I am my own person. I have never heard of this “Tony Blair”.

What he said: Mission-driven government is a different way altogether. Not state control or pure free markets, but a genuine partnership, sleeves rolled-up, working for the national interest.

What he meant: The third way.

What he said: As prime minister my personal mission would be to make mission-driven government a reality.

What he meant: As a machine-learning robot fed with the word “mission” I would be a missionary.

What he said: Now is the time for us all to be part of something bigger. And to say with one voice: why not Britain?

What he meant: You might as well vote Labour. What’s the worst that could happen?