Why you shouldn't uphold Jacinda Ardern as proof that working mothers can 'have it all'

It is all very well to grant women permission to combine motherhood and career success, but until we both recognise and compensate for the work of parenting, this is rather like giving someone permission to own a yacht

(Sean Gallup/Getty Images)

Congratulations to Jacinda Ardern! The New Zealand prime minister has just given birth to her first child and proven to the world that pregnancy is not a barrier to a successful career.

Except, of course, it is. Yes, Ardern – like Benazir Bhutto before her – has shown that women can hold the highest political office in their countries while also gestating brand new humans. Yet while this ought to make the patriarchy tremble in its boots (there’s nothing we can’t do, lads), it’s worth remembering that for most women, such feats of maternal heroism simply aren’t possible. We won’t be making new laws any time soon; we’re too busy deciding what to do with that vomiting toddler without missing the school run.

The story of Ardern and her partner Clarke Gayford, who plans on becoming a stay-at-home father, should warm the cockles of any self-respecting feminist. As former New Zealand prime minister Helen Clark puts it, “New Zealand is showing that no doors are closed to women, that having a baby while being prime minister can be managed, and that it’s acceptable for male partners to be full-time carers.”

Here in the UK, where workplace discrimination against mothers is rife and uptake of shared parental leave remains low, such a message is hugely important. Equally important, however, is that we distinguish between social prejudices, which the example of Ardern is doing much to challenge, and structural barriers to equality, most of which remain firmly in place.

It’s always worth celebrating when women break new ground. At the same time, there’s a danger in pushing the message that outlier women – the trailblazers and standouts – have unequivocally cleared the path for all women to come. There’s a fine line between “good for her” and “if she can do it, why can’t you?”

We see this frequently in UK politics, when male Tories try to use Margaret Thatcher and Theresa May as evidence that the Conservative Party have “done” feminism. With the example of Ardern, there’s a fear that if she does it all too well and makes the transition to motherhood appear too seamless, the question for the rest of us will be: “So what’s your excuse?”

Of course, most of us know the answer to that. There is a difference between that which is socially acceptable and that which is practically possible. While attitudes towards mothers in paid employment have changed significantly in recent decades (no more are we seen – universally, at least – as evil witches who love spreadsheets more than our babies), these have been replaced by the belief that we are being “allowed” to work, almost as an act of benevolence.

Maternity pay and flexible hours are still seen as perks, not minimal responses to the glaringly obvious facts of human dependency. For many women, childcare remains totally unaffordable, while the persistence of the gender pay gap creates a vicious cycle whereby it’s almost always more financially viable for a female parent to give up paid employment (which is then sold back to us as “free choice”).

It is all very well to grant women permission to combine motherhood and career success, but until we both recognise and compensate for the work of parenting, this is rather like giving someone permission to own a yacht. It doesn’t matter whether or not other people approve if it’s still unaffordable.

I’ve no desire to belittle the achievements of those who do combine motherhood with rising up economic or political hierarchies. That such women cannot do so without the support of others is unquestionably true. Nonetheless, we should be careful not to write this off as evidence of undeserved privilege or “cheating”. Just because motherhood is not like this for most women doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be.

Care work remains grossly underpaid. The answer to this is not to insist all mothers step back and do it for free, but to change the way we see work itself, and to recognise the economic and social value of gestational and reproductive labour. Right now there is a split between mothers who have access to public life, political influence and regular pay, and mothers who find themselves on the fringes, paid nothing for raising their own children and a pittance for raising those of others. In an equitable society, the work of caring – work from which we all benefit, at several stages of our lives – would be undertaken by all.

I’m delighted at the example Ardern sets, and look forward to her continuing to demonstrate that pregnancy, motherhood and care work can and should be embedded in political life. The more we see mothers as full participants in public discourse and social change, the better.

It’s important, though, to be clear about realities for other women in the here and now. Being shown what can be possible is not the same as being offered it. Pregnancy and motherhood should not exclude us from career success, but the truth is, they do. Let’s celebrate Jacinda Arden’s happy news, but let’s also make it an opportunity to ask for more of it.