Boris Johnson finally got his zombie parliament – but now his Brexit masterplan is falling apart

Editorial: The supposedly clever plans of the prime minister and Dominic Cummings have turned to dust, and indeed backfired. But Brexit is still a national crisis

Welcome to Global Britain, 2019.

Even by the quaint and picturesque standards of the British parliament, the prorogation ceremony is a strikingly archaic affair: “My Lords, it not being convenient for Her Majesty personally to be present here this day, she has been pleased to cause a commission under the Great Seal to be prepared for proroguing this present parliament” is just one of the more comprehensible of the script lines to modern ears.

A collection of men and women variously dressed in tights (both genders), lush ermine robes, bicorne hats and horse hair wigs, nod and bow and recite “La Reyne le Veult” at the mention of each of the prosaic bills requiring the royal assent. In Norman French, it means that the Queen wishes it, even if the government of the day does not, necessarily. Nowhere is this more true than with the prosaically named European Union (Withdrawal) (No 6) Act, which is the one that, in effect, outlaws no-deal Brexit.

Still, the Queen did grant Boris Johnson his wish to prorogue, which is to say suspend, parliament for around five weeks. Although this move, hatched weeks earlier and expected over the late August bank holiday, has long been coming, its arrival crystallises what has actually happened. It is, as our now outgoing speaker John Bercow declared it at the time, a democratic outrage. Even though we’ve been expecting it, like a very unwelcome guest, we do not feel comfortable with it.

It does not seem right that the Commons should be at party conferences and otherwise not sitting with a matter of a few weeks to go until Brexit, a general election, or both. At a moment when the nation looks to its elected representatives to lead, to scrutinise what the government is doing in its name, to make the political weather, our MPs will be otherwise engaged. Her majesty’s government can skip parliamentary questions or appearing before select committees, or defending itself in debates for a month and more.

As with the long summer “recess”, such long breaks are indefensible. They are the antithesis of a functioning democracy. Now, more than ever, our members of parliament should be setting the nation's destiny, rather than heading off to some seaside resort or spa town to discuss the merits of nationalising the railways or how Priti Patel is doing in her new job. Unlike Westminster's charming pageantry and the arcane lingo, this particular tradition is actively harmful for the national interest. It is bad enough when MPs themselves decide to absent themselves from what is supposed to be the cockpit of the nation; it is far, far worse when the royal prerogative exercised by the prime minister alone is abused to suspend parliamentary democracy at a time of his convenience.

So it is all the more satisfying that so many of the supposedly clever plans of Mr Johnson and Dominic Cummings have turned to dust, and indeed backfired. The shock decision to suspend parliament did not stymie the opponents of their no-deal strategy but made the likes of Hilary Benn and Dominic Grieve all the more determined to use the urgent and narrowing window of opportunity to pass watertight anti no-deal legislation.

When Mr Johnson sacked 21 rebels from his own party, he removed the least disciplinary weapon he could use to keep any of them in line, and lost his formal majority with it. In telegraphing his intention to hold a snap general election, he achieved the almost impossible and got all the opposition parties united to prevent it. With his bluster and bluff he has somehow made Jeremy Corbyn and John McDonnell look at ease and in control of events. Mr Johnson has even lost his chance of replacing speaker Bercow with someone more to his taste.

Still, it was and is a democratic outrage that the House of Commons will lie empty bar parties of tourists and schoolchildren admiring the nice old fixtures and fittings. At a moment when we need a forum to help resolve this great national crisis we have instead a museum piece, a zombie parliament and a rash and erratic prime minister. No wonder the world is wondering whatever happened to Great Britain.