The Sketch: Simon Carr
For once, they resist the urge to get involved
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Your support makes all the difference.The doldrums (Putting the Environment at the Heart of Government) were interrupted by a hiatus (Lord Dholakia's Address to the Nation) which evolved into a gentle lull (Housing Transfer Ballots – A Level Playing Field) which became quite turbulent for a lull until the Looming Care Crisis took us back again into a familiar, soothing lacuna.
Not enough resources. Not enough training. Not enough budget. Not enough care. Not enough money. Old people lying around in poverty. Nowhere else to go. Blocking beds. What's to be done?
More training. More dignity. More respect. More carers. More money. More regional strategic implementation. Penny on income tax. Bob's your uncle. Blocking a bed near you.
The MEP Liz Lynne wailed: Why couldn't the Government see it was cheaper to keep old people in £400 nursing home beds than £1,200 hospital beds? The answer is: Because they are politicians. When politicians do something it makes things worse – first rule of politics, actually.
Ruth Berry kicked along the hand-wringing: "The bureaucracy involved is ridiculous. I wouldn't be at all surprised if it costs almost as much as it would have done to introduce free personal care!" Powerful speaker; probably psychic.
It was in this context that we approached the last debate: Improving the Gender Balance in Politics.
Liberal Democrats present themselves as the party of freedom. Being politicians, they do the opposite. They believe more law produces more justice. If women are under-represented in Parliament, therefore, they instinctively want to regulate for all-women shortlists.
Candy Piercey spoke against the motion. That was surprising; any Liberal Democrat speaking against such a motion. All-women shortlists had a basic failing, she said, citing the party's slogan "Freedom. Justice. Honesty". The local party would not be free. There was no justice for good male ethnic-minority candidates. And the honesty thing didn't work, for reasons that escape me for the moment.
Ian Cuthbertson observed that such shortlists were a luxury. The Libs Dems were short of everything: assessors, returning officers and, most of all, candidates. "We're desperate for any candidate from any group!"
Lyn-Su Floodgate, armed with all the terrible certainties of youth, caused whoops of delight, vowing that she would get into Parliament without the help of a rigged selection process. God help us, she probably will.
Every bone in Jackie Ballard's body, she said, was opposed to positive discrimination. Every bone in her body was also opposed to gender imbalances. With her skeleton in a terrible state, her knees jerking in two different directions, she beseeched the conference to adopt all-women shortlists.
They rejected them. Extraordinary thing. It made you like the Lib Dems.
Most extraordinary thing.
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