I won’t take my son to see Blue Story. It’s not an education, it’s a threat

As the mother of a young black boy, I am terrified the film about knife crime will lure my son into a dangerous world he may wish to explore, a world that has no place in his life. I am not going to take that risk

Like most mothers, I started planning my son’s transition from primary to secondary school months in advance. Part of that was preparing children to make their way to and from school alone. The parents’ WhatsApp and Facebook groups were buzzing with messages such as, “Michael went to school all on his own today, I’m so proud of him,” or, “Is anyone else going to drop at Tesco and let them walk the rest of the way by themselves?”

The truth was, I had nothing in common with the parents from my son’s primary school. Their concerns about Danny taking the wrong bus or Sean getting lost were far, far away from my worries as a mother of a young black boy.

James* heading off to secondary school unaided was terrifying. There is an epidemic of bloodshed on the streets of London and the victims are disproportionately black and predominantly teenagers, who are more likely to be targeted in the hours after they finish school. How the hell am I going to allow him to go back and forth to school alone?

This period caused me incredible distress and panic. So much so, I decided to take extra steps to ensure I was far closer to my son. I moved house to be closer to his new school, which is now 1,000 yards away. I also left a high paying senior role in the city to start my own company where I could be based from home, in case I was needed at a moment’s notice. I know it sounds crazy, but I have seen enough and read enough to not take any chances.

We’re almost two terms into secondary school and I have noticed a change in my son’s behaviour. He has begun to listen to drill music despite me telling him not to. He has become fixated on being popular and, what I have become most concerned about, is his use of social media. He is regularly taking pictures of himself with friends with their faces blacked out. One caption read: “No faces, no cases”. The implication being that it would protect their identity in the event of committing a crime.

I immediately became alarmed. Are these the early signs of trouble? Was I being paranoid?

Then the movie Blue Story came out and James begged me to watch it, arguing that everyone else was allowed to. Yes, but you’re not everyone else, I thought. I looked dead straight into my son’s eyes and belted out a definite, “No!”

Why? Because I was terrified it would provide James with deeper insights into a world he may wish to explore, a world that has no place in his life. I was not going to take that risk, given the recent changes I have noted.

Many of my friends with young boys feel I have made the wrong choice. They believe that by not showing him the reality of the streets (Blue Story is about knife crime) I could place him in more danger.

Well, here’s the thing. We do not live in the “streets”. We live in rural Essex. We have a huge, beautiful four-bedroom house. James has his own room, attends a top Essex school, and is a superb athlete. He gets to go on holiday twice a year and has the latest designer labels if his homework is on track. My son is not the target nor the stereotype, I kept telling myself.

But despite providing my son with a foundation that other children would crave, he appears to still identify with this street culture, and I believe secretly desires a bit of that life. I cannot explain why, I do not know why, but I would be lying if I said it wasn’t there. I fear watching the film will only fuel his curiosity and lead him down that dark path.

I have therefore realised that the knife knows no boundaries. A good upbringing doesn’t automatically exclude your child from the dangers. I read a proverb once that rings true to what is happening today on our streets: “If the village doesn’t provide a child with love, that child will burn it down to feel its warmth.”

Outrooting the rot we see and continue to see in our young black boys must be a collective effort. It must stretch further than the home. We need to see schools, the government and fashion labels such as Adidas and Nike, brands that almost celebrate “street life”, working together to help tackle the problem.

Although I decided not to take my son to see Blue Story, I don’t believe the movie should be banned. The director is a very talented man and actors such as Michael Ward, who plays a lead role, need to continue to have the opportunity to shine. After all, knife crime isn’t an issue created by Blue Story. Blue Story brings it to life. A life I am working so very hard to not knock on my doorstep.

* Name changed to protect identity