'We shouldn't have shoot-outs. We should have a shoot-the-ref shoot-out'

The Best and Worst of Boss-Speak

Chris Maume
Tuesday 21 December 1999 00:00 GMT
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You and I have been physically given two hands and two legs and half-decent brains. Some people have not been born like that for a reason. The karma is working from another lifetime. What you sow you reap. You have to look at things that happened in your life and ask why. Glenn Hoddle, in the interview that led to his dismissal as England coach.

You and I have been physically given two hands and two legs and half-decent brains. Some people have not been born like that for a reason. The karma is working from another lifetime. What you sow you reap. You have to look at things that happened in your life and ask why. Glenn Hoddle, in the interview that led to his dismissal as England coach.

I can't believe it. I can't believe it. Football, eh? Bloody hell. Alex Ferguson, Manchester United manager, after his side's last-minute victory in the European Cup final.

We've got an advantage, I suppose, because I speak the language. Kevin Keegan, England's German-speaking coach, on being drawn in Germany's group for the 2002 World Cup.

I want them all standing there singing the National Anthem. I'm not saying I'll drop them if they don't sing it - well, only if they're out of tune. Keegan, before his first England game, against Poland.

After last night, about 20. Keegan, after Scotland's victory at Wembley, asked how many Euro 2000 warm-up games he would like.

I blame the players. It was nothing to do with me. Ruud Gullit, then Newcastle manager, after defeat to Spurs.

People will say this is not before time. Who am I to argue?Brian Clough on having a stand named after him at Nottingham Forest.

I hope they all get bloody diarrhoea. Clough on Manchester United's decision to opt out of the FA Cup to play in Brazil.

I don't like all these passes. Egil Olsen, Wimbledon manager, on his philosophy.

He might have stabbed a referee for all we know, like most of us want to do from time to time. The Rushall secretary Peter Athersmith on the importance of getting information on their Kosovan player, Dino Shabani.

Referees should be wired up to a couple of electrodes and they should be allowed to make three mistakes before you run 50,000 volts through their genitals. John Gregory, Aston Villa manager.

I don't think we should have shoot-outs. We should have a shoot-the-ref shoot-out. Gregory, after his side's Worthington Cup shoot-out defeat to West Ham following a late penalty decision.

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