Wilfried Zaha: ‘It would be nice for people to take the time to understand me’

Exclusive interview: The Crystal Palace forward cannot shake the feeling he remains misunderstood

Wilfried Zaha admits there are times when football might have broken him. He’s one of England’s most instantly recognisable footballers: an £80m-rated winger trapped in a constant cycle of transfer speculation. Beneath that, though, there’s a tinge of despair in his voice when, after almost 10 years in the Premier League, he’s still not sure if people actually know who the real Wilfried Zaha is at all. “I can’t go around hoping everyone likes me,” he says. “But at the same time, it’d be nice for people to take the time to understand me.”

It’s hard to pinpoint an exact moment where Zaha became such a lightning rod for criticism. After the saga of failed summer moves to Arsenal and Everton, he’s not interested in talking about transfers and has no desire to fuel fires or burn bridges. The disappointment and bitter end to his time at Manchester United still lingers in the background. In truth, though, it feels as though the carping had attached itself to him long before, often in the form of something more sinister.

“You come from nothing, you work all the way to the top and you’re thinking I’ve finally reached this amazing platform that I’ve dreamt about my whole life,” Zaha tells The Independent. “But you still have to deal with a lot of things in football that you shouldn’t have to.”

In the past, people have been quick to redress Zaha’s concerns or dismiss them altogether, perhaps because of the warped idea that footballers’ emotions are fair game due to their wealth. And, at first, when the sense of mistreatment began to stew, he felt he had little choice but to accept it. In a world that often seems to “thrive off negativity”, the abuse was just something that walked hand-in-hand with success.

Over time, though, it steadily ate away him, stealing the enjoyment of simply playing at all.

Wilfried Zaha celebrates scoring against Brighton (Getty)

“I wish I was more outspoken when I was younger because I let a lot of things slide when I should’ve spoken up for myself,” he says. “When I started my career, I could never understand why I used to get so much abuse. Obviously, all the time I’ve had to have a thick skin and be like ‘I don’t care if people don’t like me’, but it’d be nice for them to take a minute and see how I really am. I do a lot more than what they assume to know about me.”

“I think people can’t separate the player and the person, or maybe they don’t take the time to. Some have that mentality that you’re someone that they’re supposed to hate because you’re playing against them. Now I just tell myself just to focus on what I can control and not get annoyed and frustrated about things outside of that. That’s why I’m back to enjoying my football again. I can’t control what you’ll do, what someone else will do, I’ve just got to focus on me.”

Zaha is speaking after donating £10,000 of Carling’s Made Local Fund to his local Sunday League team, Lambeth Allstars. His charity work, particularly with the Palace for Life Foundation, is a reflection of the struggles he experienced during his own upbringing. The lack of opportunities he felt as a child in London after leaving the Ivory Coast aged four and the outlet and escape football ultimately became.

“My family never had anything, I wasn’t given any handouts,” he says. “I was fortunate to be good at football. I’ve really followed that dream and worked hard every day. But at the time, I saw for my friends and myself there weren’t any glaring opportunities. Nobody putting their hand out being like try this or you can do this or helping with your future. Lots of people feel stuck. That’s the whole problem. That’s why now I give back.”

Even if he “has no regrets”, Zaha doesn’t shy away from the fact that some of his difficulties have been self-inflicted. He’s been forced to mature in the spotlight and admits there were times when it would have been “better to keep your head down”. On the pitch, he can still frustrate or leave an impression of having far more potential to fulfil. “People definitely haven’t seen the best of me yet,” he insists. “I may be 27 – I feel like I’ve been playing football forever – but there’s still more to come. I’m still understanding myself.”

The difference now is that he’s reached a point where he’s determined not to let anything dilute his love of football again. That’s the Zaha he wants people know. If not to be liked, at least to be understood. After all, football has given him so much, but not always that.

Wilfried Zaha with the Lambeth Allstars (Carling)

Wilfried Zaha has donated £10,000 of Carling’s Made Local Fund to his local Sunday League football club, Lambeth Allstars to help them continue to make a difference to lives in South London.

Carling has committed to a multi-million-pound investment over the next three years into its Made Local Fund – a community bursary designed to celebrate a generation’s ambition to make things happen in their own backyard. To discover more about Carling’s Made Local Fund and to see how you can support local projects in your hometown, visit http://carling.com/apply-for-fund.