'I think you are an ostrich': The funniest managerial quotes of the 2014/15 Premier League season
In this year's edition of 'Managers Say the Darndest Things'...
![Nigel Pearson - the quotes gift that has kept giving this season](https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2015/05/22/14/pearson-getty.jpg)
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Louise Thomas
Editor
Sometimes, it's the pressure of a relegation battle. Others, it's good old-fashioned mind games. Then there are the moments when only managers themselves know why they've said something so utterly bizarre.
All we know is that on a few priceless occasions every year, Premier League bosses cut through the monotony of sanitised, formulaic post-match interviews to go gloriously off-piste.
Fortunately the 2014/15 season has been no exception so, from dogs to ostriches, via the 'best coach in the Premier League', here are the ten best managerial quotes from this campaign:
Jose Mourinho
"Dogs bark, but the caravan keeps on."
Louis van Gaal
"West Ham United have played 71% of the long balls to the forward, and we have played 49. You can copy it, and then you go to Big Sam."
United's outspoken Dutch manager has caused a stir at every club he's managed, and his seminar (with accompanying dossier) contradicting any journalist who had implied that the Red Devils had become somewhat direct under his leadership was classic Van Gaal.
Sam Allardyce
"All this tippy tappy stuff everybody keeps going on about as the right way to play football is all a load of bollocks."
Jose Mourinho
“It’s the football they play on the moon."
Louis van Gaal
"I have seen a lady who plays the saxophone fantastically. Give her big applause!"
John Carver
"I still think I'm the best coach in the Premier League."
Dick Advocaat
“No, no, no I’ll get a divorce.”
Tim Sherwood
"It wasn't a gilet, it was a coat."
Nigel Pearson
"I can look after myself. Don't you worry about that."
John Carver
"I thought he'd done that on purpose - it looks like he did."
And the winner is...
Nigel Pearson
"If you don't know the answer to that question, then I think you are an ostrich."
![(L to R) Nigel Pearson; an ostrich (Getty)](https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2015/04/29/23/web-pearson-ostrich-getty.jpg)
What did you expect? Ostrichgate, the quote that went on to define Leicester's heroic, ultimately successful fight for survival. There's very little, in fact, to separate the 'ostrich' line itself with the gloriously bold claim that came moments later: "Are you flexible enough to get your head in the sand? My suspicion would be no. I can. You can’t." Proof that, if you can take a side rooted to the bottom of the table for much of the season to safety, you can pretty much do anything.
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