Stephen Colbert roasts Fox News for failed efforts to attack Kamala Harris

‘That’s the best you got?’ Colbert mocked Fox News’ plastic straw debate. ‘Really seems like you’re grasping at something, I don’t know what exactly’

Stephen Colbert roasted Fox News after it appeared they were clutching at straws, in more ways than one, to try to attack Kamala Harris and her newly launched presidential campaign.

On his Wednesday night show, Colbert highlighted the reports that Republican House leaders are having to urge members to stop making race comments about Harris.

“Not great when you have to remind your employees not to do something that everyone knows is wrong,” Colbert said.

“Even Fox News is having trouble coming up with a good attack line against Harris,” the Late Show host added.

“So far, this is the best they got,” then rolled footage from Fox commentators repeatedly bashing Harris over the supposed potential of her banning plastic straws, with Sean Hannity saying he “loves my plastic straw.”

“That’s the best you got?” Colbert mocked. “Really seems like you’re grasping at something, I don’t know what exactly.”

“It does make sense that Fox News would be obsessed with straws. After all… they suck,” he joked.

In 2019, Harris said during a CNN Town Hall that there does need to be a ban on plastic straws, but admitted that there needs to be innovation with the “difficult” paper straws as she thinks we can “do a little better than some of those flimsy” ones.

Colbert mocked Fox News on his Wednesday night ‘The Late Show’ after they spotlighted their upset that Harris reportedly wants to ban plastic straws (The Late Show with Stephen Colbert)

While Fox tried to challenge Harris’ policies in this particular sector, polls show that Harris has been leading her Republican election rival, Donald Trump, since she entered the presidential race.

Colbert first prefaced that “polls have been wrong all year” and that “polls don’t vote, people do,” then delivered the news that “yesterday, a Reuters-Ipsos poll had Vice President Kamala Harris leading former president Donald Trump 44 to 42.”

Despite what the host said, he let out a huge yell of excitement and danced around the sound stage while shouting, “It’s over!”

After calming down, Colbert said: “I’m being told it’s not over; it just feels better.”

Colbert admitted that this week, he has been in a particularly good mood since Harris launched her campaign.

“I’m a little worried because since Sunday afternoon, I haven’t been that worried, and that is deeply troubling,” he joked. “I personally blame our next president, Kamala Harris.”

Democratic presidential candidate Kamala Harris speaks at West Allis Central High School during her first campaign rally in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, on July 23, 2024. Colbert said that things just ‘feel better’ now Harris is in the running (AFP via Getty Images)

Harris debuted at her first campaign rally as the presumptive Democratic nominee on Tuesday in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where she stated that she would “proudly put my record against his [Trump’s] any day of the week.”

For Colbert, however, there was something more invigorating to witness.

“I’ve got to say; it was refreshing to see a presidential rally without a single wrestler from the 1980s,” Colbert said, likely referring to Hulk Hogan Trump rally appearances, most recently ripping his shirt off at the Republican National Convention while calling the former president his “hero.”

The Vice President’s presidential campaign also has been able to raise a notable $126 million between Sunday, with Biden’s departure, and Tuesday, according to a memo from the Harris campaign chair Jen O’Malley Dillon.

“That means that Kamala Harris had a bigger opening weekend than Twisters,” Colbert said. The movie raised around $80.5m at the box office over the weekend.

Colbert then declared he had a great idea for the Harris campaign: “Oh wait, hold on, hear me out, no more ideas, this is it: Glen Powell becomes Harris’s running mate. I guarantee – I guarantee he will attract suburban women, and I already have his slogan: ‘Yes, We Glen.’ ‘Four more abs! Four more abs!’”