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‘Sarm Heslop was the best man at my wedding - I must find out what happened to her’

Sarm Heslop vanished from her American boyfriend Ryan Bane’s 47-foot luxury catamaran in the US Virgin Islands in 2021 and has not been seen since

Barney Davis
Tuesday 05 March 2024 08:55 GMT
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Drone footage of the spot where Sarm Heslop vanished

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The best friend of missing Sarm Heslop has told her boyfriend and person of interest in her disappearance to do “right by her” and let police search his yacht where she was last seen alive.

Ms Heslop vanished from her American boyfriend Ryan Bane’s 47-foot luxury catamaran Siren Song on 8 March 2021. The 41-year-old former flight attendant was last seen aboard Mr Bane’s boat, where she had been working as a chef as it was hired for $2,000 a day charters around the Caribbean.

According to authorities, the couple who matched on Tinder eight months earlier, had been out for dinner at the bar 420 to Center on St John before returning to the £500,000 catamaran late that night.

Sarm was last seen stepping back onto the Siren Song three years ago
Sarm was last seen stepping back onto the Siren Song three years ago (Find Sarm)

Mr Bane would later say they watched Netflix and fell asleep. He called 911 at about 2.35am the next morning, told police that he had been woken by the anchor alarm and went to investigate and realised that she was missing. Ms Heslop’s wallet, passport and phone had been left on board, and he said she might have fallen overboard.

The sea captain waited until 11.46am the next day to call the Coast Guard - a nine hour gap which her friends and now family want him to provide a timeline for.

Mr Bane has never been formally interviewed by police and no forensic search of the boat, Siren Song, was ever carried out.

In the days after Ms Heslop’s disappearance, Mr Bane told family he was searching for her as he reportedly hired an attorney and declined to be interviewed by Virgin Islands Police. He sailed off in the days after the disappearance and was spotted in Caribbean islands before pictures emerged of him hitting the gym in his home state of Michigan.

Her mother Brenda Street, 67, told The People newspaper: “I don’t believe Sarm just went missing. I believe she was murdered. I want justice for her.”

Ms Heslop’s disappearance is still being treated as a missing persons case
Ms Heslop’s disappearance is still being treated as a missing persons case (FindSarm)

She is not accusing Bane of having any part in her daughter’s death but she believes he has stopped her family from finding out what happened to her.

He has since been described as a “person of interest” by Virgin Island authorities, who are still treating the case as a missing persons investigation. Mr Bane has denied any wrongdoing.

Ms Heslop’s best friend Andrew Baldwin, 44, struggled to talk about her in the past tense when he spoke to the Independent about his ongoing search for answers.

“She was a real burst of energy,” he said. “Just a real life and soul of any group. She was a loyal friend and really would do anything for anybody. The lust for life she had was just incredible.

Andrew Baldwin on his wedding day with his best man Sarm
Andrew Baldwin on his wedding day with his best man Sarm (FindSarm)

“There was no doubt who I would ask to be my best man. She was a bit surprised because it’s a bit unconventional but she was overwhelmed to be asked. That memory of her on my wedding day is the one I always fall back on.

“She was always up for travel seeing new places, meeting new people, having new experiences and that’s what really took her to the Caribbean and she got into that lifestyle of working and traveling around. Adventure - that’s what led her to where she was - on that yacht and where she got lost.”

Her partner Ryan Bane was not arrested
Her partner Ryan Bane was not arrested (Find Sarm)

“I spoke to her a few weeks before she went missing,” he continued. “We stayed in regular contact by message. It was very much like ‘How are you doing? Where are you today?’

“She was travelling the world like trying to get around all the Covid restrictions. I wasn’t worried about her. She was street-smart and savvy.

“She’s a person that if she was in a situation that she wasn’t comfortable in she would get out of that situation.

“When we got the call to say she was missing and by that time she’d been missing overnight I feared the worst. I know she would have contacted someone immediately.”

On Mr Bane, who has a conviction for assaulting his ex-wife, he added: “We had a few conversations where she said ‘I met someone new. I want to go back out to be with him’.

Sarm Heslop, right, with her mother Brenda Street. Heslop has been missing for two years after disappearing from her boyfriend’s boat in the US Virgin Islands
Sarm Heslop, right, with her mother Brenda Street. Heslop has been missing for two years after disappearing from her boyfriend’s boat in the US Virgin Islands (Courtesy of Heslop family)

“I told her it’s your life you have to do what you need to do to be happy. But I wish I knew then what I know now I would have told her to stay away from him as much as possible.

“I check all my friend’s boyfriend’s histories now. I spoke to him in the very early days. He was telling me all the stuff he had been doing like taking the boat out to find her.

“I think my message to him has always been really clear. We ask him to talk to the police if he has nothing to worry about. Me, her family and friends just want to understand what happened that night. And if he hasn’t spoken to the police to clarify or even to answer questions, then how will we know?”

On the yacht: “Why won’t you let that boat be searched? You’ve got nothing to hide.

“You loved her, you loved our friend and you wanted to be there for her then please do right by her to find out. Stop putting up barriers.

“You are carrying on with your life while her family and friends are at a loss without her.”

Mr Heslop was sailing off the coast of St John in the US Virgin Islands when she vanished
Mr Heslop was sailing off the coast of St John in the US Virgin Islands when she vanished (FindSarm/PA))

He said it has been a struggle corresponding with Virgin Islands Police who he said failed to respond to his last ten emails. Island police showed her parents her last known sighting on CCTV before it got abruptly cut off before they stepped on the boat.

Despite multiple requests, the CCTV has never been made public leaving her family wondering what happens next.

Mr Baldwin said: “If this was a UK investigation no stone would be left unturned. It’s difficult to compare but the Nicola Bulley case the resources, the dogs, the helicopters were up for weeks.

“We get the impression they just want us to go away. But we’re not going anywhere we are very determined to find out what happened to our friend. She would do the same for me.

“It’s been difficult to sleep it’s the not-knowing is what gets you. We don’t know if she’s dead or alive. If you needed someone to talk to she was always there. Everyone misses her laugh and her presence.”

David Johnston QPM, former Commander of Homicide and Serious Crime at Metropolitan Police, has been hired by the family to represent them and co-ordinate a search with Virgin Islands authorities.

“The US Virgin Islands Police Dept claim that the case is open and ongoing and yet they are refusing to treat Sarm’s family with the dignity of even a response to our emails and letters,” he said. “Meanwhile we understand that Ryan Bane has resurfaced in the US without ever being formally questioned by the police.”

Mr Bane’s lawyer David Cattie said: “Mr Bane is heartbroken over Sarm’s disappearance. We certainly understand and empathise with her mother’s pain and frustration.

“Mr Bane called 911 immediately upon waking and finding Sarm was not on board. He took his dinghy to shore to meet with VIPD that night and called the USCG the next day when no one appeared at his boat. He also had the USCG on his vessel twice following Sarm’s disappearance. Later Mr Bane and I personally took all of Sarm’s belongings to the police, including all of her electronic devices.”

Anyone with information regarding the whereabouts of Sarm is urged to call Crime Stoppers USVI at (800) 222-TIPS

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