Paul Kaye: This Cultural Life

"I learnt more from The Clash than I did at school"<br/>The comedian loves punk rock and G&uuml;nter Grass - but he's got some career advice for Nicolas Cage

What are you reading in bed at the moment?

I'm reading the Vic Reeves book, Me: Moir. I love Vic, he's a real original. I saw him interviewed on Richard and Judy and I thought, I really want to find out about his upbringing.

Do you read a lot of biographies?

I do. That's probably what I read more of than anything else. I found a really lovely book of Jean Cocteau murals, because I'm planning to paint a couple of dancing devils on my bathroom wall. I find him a very intriguing character.

Do you tend to re-read books?

I do. The two books I've re-read more than any others are Günter Grass's The Tin Drum and Victor Hugo's Notre-Dame de Paris. I read them when I was quite young and I always feel great when I read them and everything comes flooding back. I'm a big dipper: there's a fantastic book on New York called Please Kill Me by Legs McNeil. It's an amazing book. It's one of those commentaries which has got interviews with all the main protagonists [of early punk rock]. Seventy-two to '76 in New York was really "Year Zero", and everything goes back to Iggy Pop. He was The Big Bang. I can't get enough of all that shit.

Have you ever bought a book in a fit of misguided enthusiasm?

I was trying to get through The Book of Dave, the Will Self novel. He's an incredible guy, but there's something about that book. I can only understand one out of every five words. It just makes me feel really sick! Also, I came across a little Jewish cook book called, Surprise Yourself with Herring, which is just the most amazing title for a book. So I bought 10 of them. I like having 10 of them in a row.

Do you have a hole in your cultural life?

I don't get to go to the cinema very often these days, or the theatre, which I'd like to do more. I saw a production of Shakespeare's Cymbeline at the Restormel Castle in Cornwall about a month ago, and it was fantastic. It was by a company called the Kneehigh Theatre. Everyone was sitting in the drizzle, and there's people with flaming torches running around the ramparts. Wow! I studied theatre design up in Nottingham and it was what I always imagined theatre to be like: really imaginative, really inventive.

What do you cling on to from childhood?

From the age of 14 onwards it was really punk rock, The Clash particularly. I think I learnt more from them than I did at school, because that got me into fashion, politics... My gran used to live in Maida Vale, and when we were 13 we walked past Sid Vicious and Nancy Spungen - this huge, gangling guy with this woman with peroxide hair. Life changing! What I find really life-affirming is that I've got into The Libertines just as I got into the Clash 25 years earlier. I don't know whether that makes me a sad 41-year-old but it's really wonderful that it can still ignite you in the same way. People like Pete Doherty: he's probably the most culturally significant person since John Lydon.

What is the least disposable pop song?

I was thinking "Another Girl, Another Planet" by the Only Ones. It's an absolute belter, but it's just turned up on an advert so it's disposed of instantly! It's so annoying.

If you could steal one cultural item, what would you take?

It's a bit sad, but Mickey Thomas's boot. He scored a goal at Anfield for Arsenal in 1989 that won us the League in the most dramatic circumstances. And I was doing a bit of research in the Arsenal museum, as you do, and I came across this boot in a glass cabinet. It did cross my mind that I could steal it and go and live in a cave somewhere, just me and the boot.

What is your ideal alternative job?

I can't imagine doing anything else, but then I'm not quite sure what it is I do anyway. I suppose it would be painting murals or scenery, maybe illustrating a bit. I've tried, in periods of unemployment, to pick up a paintbrush. Nothing too major.

Which painting most corresponds with your vision of yourself?

There's a postcard that I've had since my foundation course, which is The Art Critic by Raoul Hausmann. It influenced my style a lot, and the character looks bitter, twisted and likely to hate everything, which is me on a bad day.

Would you consider yourself a cool person?

Well, yeah, here and there. It's a bit tragic but, if you're brought up with Pennie Smith's Before and After - the Clash book - it does have a long-term effect on how you lean against petrol pumps or stand nonchalantly at bars. I do find myself still leaning against things like Paul Simonon.

What is the most fashionable thing you own?

For the It's All Gone Pete Tong premiere, I bought a couple of vintage Vivienne Westwood suits: a purple one and a pale blue zoot suit, but I never wore either of them. I don't know what I was thinking when I bought them, but I haven't thought it since.

Who would play you in the Hollywood version of your life? And who would be your nemesis?

When I was younger I looked a bit like Matthew Modine out of Birdy. My nemesis would probably be Nicolas Cage, because I wish he'd retired after Wild at Heart. Everything he's done since then has stunk of poo.

Your house is on fire. What do you save?

It would have to be this little Joe Strummer flag. There were loads of flags on his coffin at his funeral and I think I saw Keith Allen take one, so I took one. It turned out to be a Nicaraguan one, which was a country very close to his heart. I just cherish it.

You die and go to heaven. Who would you like to meet at the bar?

It would be my late father-in-law, Rafi, because he was the most cultured man I ever knew, but not in a bullshit way: he was cultured in sweat and socialism. He survived stomach cancer for years and got off his deathbed and went and built a huge stone olive press on the front lawn. Then he went back to bed and died. He was a true life force.

* 'Strutter' launches on MTV at 10.30pm on Thursday