Pam pelts Julien with her fur-free fashion tips

* This time last year, anti-fur protesters coated the fashion designer Julien Macdonald with a flour bomb as he posed with hotel heiress Paris Hilton.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (Peta) objected to his fur-heavy show: there was, they said, "nothing fashionable about the torture and death of animals killed for fur".

The white-faced Welshman shot back: "I adore fur; it adds ultimate luxury and glamour to my collections."

Macdonald will hope to avoid wearing the same outfit this year. He'll not escape controversy over his use of lavish pelts, however, having received a surprise ticking-off from the liberally-clothed model Pamela Anderson.

Macdonald invited her to his show last night and offered to design her an outfit (enclosing her illustrious, cosmetically-enhanced bosom). But Anderson, once famous for running along the beach in an orange cozzie, is now an honorary director of Peta. She rebuffed him.

"I truly appreciate [it]," wrote Pam, explaining that she had no intention of visiting London. "I'm hoping you can extend your kindness to include animals. If you stop using fur, I'd be thrilled to attend a show of yours in the future."

If it consoles Macdonald, protesters have not bestow-ed upon him the demonised status of Anna Wintour, editor of US Vogue, who has been cream-pied and mailed maggot-infested animal guts.

Macdonald will know he's made it as a fur champion when an activist approaches him in a restaurant, throws a dead racoon in his soup and shouts, "This is for the animals, fur hag." (Ask Wintour.)

* When Stephen Fry stopped compèring the Baftas after six years, Jonathan Ross - with his passion for film and his status as a presenter this side of the Atlantic - seemed an obvious replacement.

Ross won laughs by saluting Hollywood execs who made the trip to London "to escape from Victoria Beckham", and insisting that "a good acceptance speech should be like a Scientologist birth: no tears and as few words as possible".

Several nominees seemed "tenser than Mel Gibson in a synagogue", he added.

Ross's performance was poorly received by some guests, though, who thought it overly scripted and devoid of Fry's lighter repartee. Says a senior Academy member: "The BBC were the live broadcasters and made it clear that they wanted Ross to host the show.

"There's resentment from members because he didn't go down well, despite costing much more than Fry, who was very popular."

But a Bafta insider replies: "Members are entitled to their opinions. And the Beeb negotiated Ross's fee - not us."

* Those anger management classes seem to be paying off for the phone-flinging supermodel Naomi Campbell. On Monday, her journey to the Elle Style Awards (where she won Best Model) ground to a halt when her car broke down with a flat tyre. The designer Zandra Rhodes was also in the vehicle.

In times gone by, such an incident would be the cue for Campbell to spit out the proverbial diamante dummy.

Disappointingly, on this occasion she did not bludgeon the driver with a tyre iron and throw him through the windscreen. Instead, she stepped out into the Covent Garden traffic and hailed a cab.

Says a spokeswoman: "Naomi was as cool as a cucumber. She found the whole thing very funny." To top it off, La Campbell then rewarded the helpful cabbie with a "very generous" tip. Wonders, etc!

* Back to Pandora's old friend, the esteemed Evening Standard theatre critic Nicholas de Jongh.

Monikered "de Dongh Corleone" for his assassinations of new productions, the scribe has panned the new monologue Underneath the Lintel, showcasing Richard Schiff - best known as the curmudgeonly communications director Toby Ziegler in The West Wing.

He claims that Schiff is "boring and emotionally restricted", adding: "His voice remains almost monotonic, some end-of-the sentence words swallowed."

Says my man in the stalls: "Schiff was actually pretty good. I sat on the same row as de Jongh. I imagine he had difficulty hearing the ends of sentences because he was making such a fucking racket with his packet of Wine Gums."

Ding Dongh!

* On St Valentine's of all days, I hear of an unfragrant conflab between the thinktank Policy Exchange and Lib Dem Norman Baker.

The MP campaigns on "flower miles", urging consumers to leave lower carbon footprints by buying their posies locally. But Policy Exchange research director Dr Oliver Marc Hartwich points out that in February, British roses need to be grown in heated greenhouses. He calculates: "To grow 10,000 roses in England, it takes the energy of about four barrels of oil. [Importing 10,000 from] India or Kenya, it takes only one barrel." (Hint: don't buy her 10,000 roses or she'll run for the hills.)

Counters Baker: "It is perfectly possible to buy other British flowers. Perhaps Dr Hartwich could treat his wife to some carnations, or even daffodils which, thanks to global warming, have already begun to appear here in Sussex."

pandora@independent.co.uk