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Oprah Winfrey 'could not have had the life she built' if she had got married

Winfrey has been in a relationship with Stedman Graham since 1986

Olivia Blair
Wednesday 18 November 2015 16:55 GMT
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Stedman proposed to Oprah over twenty years ago but the two postponed and then 'never discussed it again'
Stedman proposed to Oprah over twenty years ago but the two postponed and then 'never discussed it again' (Jason Merritt/Getty Images)

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Oprah Winfrey says she believes she could not have led the life she has if she had got married.

The media mogul explained her decision not to wed her partner of 29 years during a conversation with television producer Shonda Rhimes on her discussion show Super Soul Sunday.

Rhimes, who is best-known for writing and producing the television series Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal, spoke to Winfrey about the pressure she faced from the media and the public to conform by getting married.

Rhimes "never wanted to get married" and told Winfrey she feels amazed by the perception there is something wrong with her because she chose to be single.

“The desire to want to get married is a lot like the desire to want to have children in our society, you’re supposed to want it and if you don’t want it, ‘What’s wrong with you?’ It’s fascinating to me.”

Winfrey, 61, shared the sentiments of Rhimes, explaining why she has not married her long-term partner Stedman Graham.

She told how despite previously thinking she wanted to be married, after accepting a proposal from Graham twenty years ago, she became unsure.

She said: “The moment he asked me to marry him I was like: ‘Oh god, now I actually have to get married?’”

The couple planned a wedding in 1993 but postponed the nuptials to avoid coinciding with Winfrey's book release.

However, the book never materialised and the pair “never discussed it [marriage] again”.

“What I realised is, I don’t want to be married. Because I could not have the life that I created for myself… I knew that I couldn’t do it,” she said.

Winfrey has been the subject of numerous tabloid stories speculating why she and Graham did not marry, but she says her reason for not getting wed is simple. "I didn't want it".

The couple have been together for 29 years. Graham, 64, is the CEO of a marketing and consulting firm as well as a public speaker.

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