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The advice 30-year-olds want to give to their 20-year-old selves

From not staying in college or going to the gym, to joining the military as a woman or marrying the wrong person

Kate Ng
Wednesday 13 January 2016 15:21 GMT
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What do you wish your younger self had known?
What do you wish your younger self had known? (Flickr/nataliej)

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People over the age of 35 are sharing the advice they wish they had taken during their 20s.

The thread, which has over 15,000 comments on Reddit, has a range of regrets – from broad ones such as not staying in college or going to the gym, to specific ones about joining the military as a woman or marrying the wrong person.

The best advice, as voted by Reddit users, was posted by "tentoothpicks", who said: “’Because other people expect me to’ is a very poor reason to do anything.”

This advice was backed up by another user, who said: “If you do something that doesn’t feel right to you because someone else expects you to, you’ll eventually disappoint them anyway because your heart isn’t in what you’re doing and you’ll burn out.

“I’d rather disappoint someone by doing what I want than by doing what they want.”

Some users chastised their younger selves for not using their money wisely and putting themselves in debt at an older age.

One person said he should have learned how to manage his money better, and started saving between the ages of 18 and 22.

Another user, Icarus_Jones, said bluntly: “Read a few books on personal finance, and quit pissing your money away.”

If stuck in a rut, one must make a conscientious decision to get out of it, according to user Shangrilama, who said: “You’re not stuck unless you let yourself be stuck… not with that person, or that job, or that life.

“You can change it if you have the guts, and it’s better to do it when you know it is intolerable than to try to ‘stick it out’ hoping things will get better. They only get better if you make them better.”

Some of the regrets were more specific, such as the case of user Mgsoloist, who joined the Army only to be dismayed at the level of misogyny she claims she experienced.

“If you’re a female and join the Army… well. May God have mercy on your soul,” she writes.

Some of the comments she heard included accusations she slept with a higher-ranking officer to “get ahead” because “females have no place here”.

“In reality, I’m married and sleeping with nobody but my husband, but s**t gets f*****g hostile. There’s a lot of guys that are really cool and will defend me and my name till the end of days. And the others who think that females are only there for their convenience,” she continued.

Mrs Obama's advice to girls

Another user's post, which was upvoted moer than 2,000 times, was particularly heartbreaking: "Be there for your sister. She will need you. Of all the regrets in my life, her death was by far the most painful.

"Do not take those in your life for granted. They are what truly matter above all else."

Some users had less serious regrets, such as Reddit user EnricoPalazz0, who wishes his younger self knew that "getting that sweet tribal band tattoo will be the decision you come to regret most".

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