How to survive the staffroom minefield
Your support helps us to tell the story
From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.
At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.
The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.
Your support makes all the difference.FORGET A-LEVELS, degrees, inspection grades and employment rates - having a spare coffee mug and not sitting in the wrong chair are the skills trainee teachers really need.
The advice is spelt out in an official guide for people starting their first jobs in school. It says new teachers should never cry (at least not until the children have left the room) and must bite their tongues when "old timers" mutter. Staffrooms are "hotbeds of gossip", but recruits are told to remember it is "the place where the real power structure of your school is revealed".
New arrivals should take two mugs to school (one bearing their name), as "many a teacher has been known to cry at the sight of an empty mug rack".
Eager newcomers are warned: "You are unlikely to be told the Law of Seating Arrangements until you commit the ultimate offence. Observe your colleagues for a few days."
Elizabeth Holmes, the book's author and a former teacher, writes that personality clashes are "almost inevitable... but there is always a thread of empathy that can be built on". Staffroom romances, however, are a bit more tricky, and "pupils will catch on very quickly about what is going on".
Learn how to butter up secretaries and fellow teachers - and the cleaners, the book says. "Perhaps a small gift for the secretary who prepared worksheets at the last minute or the bursar who dealt with your muddle of monies for the school trip will nurture your relationships."
Teachers are encouraged to spray classroom with "well- diluted essential oils. Neroli is said to be stress reducing, juniper stimulating, lavender relaxing and lemon uplifting."
Handbook for Newly Qualified Teachers, published by The Stationery Office at pounds 12.99
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
Comments