Husband accused of ‘emotional abuse’ for hiding recording device to spy on wife’s girls night at home

‘This is DISTURBING,’ one commenter writes

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A husband has been slammed for hiding a recording device in his home, during his wife’s night in with her friends.

In a recent post shared in the Reddit forum, “Am I the A**hole,” @u/WeekThrowRA309, a 26-year-old woman, detailed how she told her 31-year-old husband that she wanted to have a girls night at their house.

While he initially recommended his wife to go to a hotel for that, she then told him that she “couldn’t afford it” nor was there a “need for it.” He then agreed to let her have her friends over, as he went out with his own friends.

When she invited her friends, the Reddit user recalled how they had a lot to talk about. And throughout the night, the wife found an unknown device.

“I invited the girls over and most of them had a lot of heavy venting to do, at some point, things got a bit emotionally charged and there was crying, lots of it,” she wrote. “When I went to turn the TV on, I spotted a small device tucked on the side. I took a look and found that it was actually a voice recording device.”

“I was in disbelief,” she added. “I knew my husband put it in there to listen to our private talk which felt highly violating.”

She noted that she instantly called her husband to “confront him right there” in front of her friends, who were “shocked,” as he denied knowing about the device.

After calling him out again, the husband admitted that “he was feeling curious to know about what [they] were talking about and wanted to make sure [they] weren’t ‘trash’ talking [about] him specifically.”

Since the event was then “cut short,” she “lashed out” at her husband for “ruining the night” and potentially damaging her “relationship” with her friends.

“I said that not only did he violate my privacy, but my friends’ as well,” the post continued. “Because they were talking about very personal stuff. He argued that it was no big deal, that I should’ve let him join us if we ‘had nothing to hide,’ and that this was ON THEM for opening up about private matters to begin with.”

He then told his wife that she “humiliated him” in front of her friends, but she still felt like they deserved to know about the recorder. However, after the argument, the wife was left wondering if she “made a mistake” by “calling him out.”

As of 1 March, the Reddit post has over 21,500 upvotes, with readers in the comments expressing how the husband was in the wrong in the situation and how it could negatively impact his marriage.

“He’s 100 per cent in the wrong,” one wrote. “He has no regard for you or your privacy and I would honestly look at this relationship and ask yourself if it’s worth it. I don’t see this behaviour ever getting better without serious intervention.”

“Doing this at all is definitely controlling, shows he doesn’t trust you, and can potentially alienate you from your friends if you stay with him,” another added.

Many other Reddit users claimed that the original poster should put an end to her marriage after the incident.

“I don’t usually agree with the suggestion of divorce, but in this case you need to,” a comment reads. “Not only has he irrevocably broken your trust in him but he may have caused damage to your friendships. He also gaslighted you by saying he should have been invited if there was nothing to hide.”

“Honey run,” another added. “He’s controlling and borderline emotionally abusive. Don’t go for couples counselling, go for a divorce lawyer. This is DISTURBING.”

The Independent has reached out to @u/WeekThrowRA309.