Bride-to-be defended for wanting to have wedding with only vegetarian food

‘It’s a decision that is up to the spouses on their day,’ one person responds on Reddit

Amber Raiken
New York
Sunday 21 July 2024 12:15 BST
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Bride-to-be explains that when she and her fiancé were looking at food choices for their wedding, they ’thought it would be nice to have a fully vegetarian menu’
Bride-to-be explains that when she and her fiancé were looking at food choices for their wedding, they ’thought it would be nice to have a fully vegetarian menu’ (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

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A bride-to-be has been defended for only wanting to serve vegetarian food at her wedding.

In a recent post shared to the popular “Am I The A**hole?” Reddit forum, a woman shared how she’s in the midst of finalizing their “menu choices” for her wedding guests. While she noted that she and her partner are both vegetarians, she acknowledged that they’re “pretty relaxed” about it.

“If we go out, we totally don’t mind if our friends/family choose meat or fish to eat, same if we visit family. As long as there is a veggie option, then great,” she wrote.

She then explained that when she and her fiancé were looking at food choices for the wedding, they “thought it would be nice to have a fully vegetarian menu,” since it’s their big day. However, when their parents – who are paying for the meal – discovered the menu choice, they were “absolutely stunned.”

“They say it’s disrespectful to people who aren’t in the vegetarian culture, and also disrespectful to our own values in terms of ensuring our friends have a nice time,” the bride-to-be continued. “They say it’s forcing our ethics on other people.”

However, she defended her decision to serve vegetarian food, noting that she will make sure the meal tastes good. Still, her parents were not pleased with the idea.

“My viewpoint is: it is one meal only, on our day, where I’m sure it will be delicious whatever they’re served,” she added. “None of our friends have ever complained when coming to our house for (vegetarian) food but my parents say it’s different at a wedding because people ‘expect luxury food,’ especially if they are traveling from abroad (many are) and apparently this needs to include meat.”

After noting that she’s “torn” on what to do, she acknowledged that she didn’t necessarily mind if her guests “eat meat.” While continuing to explain why she wants to serve vegetarian food, she expressed how she felt like her parents still had a say in the decision, since they’re paying for the meals.

“[Eating meat] is inconsistent with our own life choices and it is our day, so that could make it feel inauthentic,” she concluded. “And I think the whole focus on meat thing is quite generational (my parents are in their 60s). My fiancé agrees with me but the issue is my parents are (very kindly) paying for the meal.”

The Reddit post has quickly gone viral, with more than 3,400 upvotes. In the comments, multiple people came to the bride and groom’s defense, noting that they should be able to have the food they want on their big day. They also praised the variety of vegetarian options that could be served at the wedding, while criticizing the woman’s parents for pushing to offer meat in the meals.

“Omnivores have all eaten plenty of vegetarian and even vegan meals without intending to. Had a bowl of cereal for breakfast? Bam - vegetarian meal. It does not seem like it’s pushing anything on anyone, any more than ANY other food choice would be,” one wrote. “If you offered chicken would you be ‘pushing chicken onto people’? This is being overly politicized and overly dramatized by the people around you.”

“Just as with dry weddings, it’s a decision that is up to the spouses on their day. As you say, it’s a single meal: no one dies if they don’t drink alcohol or eat meat or fish for a meal. You don’t have to get wasted or eat half an ox to have fun,” another wrote. “I believe your parents have an old-fashioned and narrow view of vegetarian cuisine, and probably imagine that guests will be served only a bowl of salad as if they were bunnies.”

“As someone who is required to eat meat protein for my health, I think I could easily survive one delicious meat-free meal for a special one’s special day,” a third added. “Before I had to eat it more often, I still only ate meat maybe three times a week. It’s just not that big a deal to not have meat at ONE meal. Who eats it three times a day, anyway?”

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