Tess Holliday explains why she responds to hurtful messages with 'compassion'

The plus-size model said modelling changed her life 

Chelsea Ritschel
New York
Monday 15 April 2019 18:53 BST
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Tess Holliday explains why she responds to mean messages with compassion (Getty)
Tess Holliday explains why she responds to mean messages with compassion (Getty)

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Tess Holliday has explained why she responds to the hateful comments she receives on social media with love and compassion, despite dealing with them her “entire life”.

In an essay for InStyle, Holliday opened up about the daily messages she receives, which often mock her weight and call her “disgusting”.

According to Holliday, the messages do affect her, but she’d rather respond from a place of compassion - as she has found she has been able to get through to people.

One instance the plus-size model recalled was a time she received a message from a woman telling her how disgusting she was.

Rather than respond with anger, Holliday went to the woman’s Instagram profile and realised that she was recovering from anorexia.

“So I wrote to her: ‘I’m sad because you must be feeling really horrible to say such nasty things to me. The diet culture is f**ked up and has ruined so many lives. Good luck with your recovery,” Holliday wrote.

According to the model, who has more than 1.8m Instagram followers, the woman responded to the message with “thank you” and a sad face - a reply that Holliday “wasn’t expecting”.

“It’s nice when you’re able to get through to people,” she wrote.

In addition to responding to negativity with positivity, the 33-year-old also understands it is okay to mute people on social media who make her feel bad - and focus on self-care instead, either by deleting social media from her phone or playing online games.

Despite the online bullying she still faces over her weight, Holliday thinks we are living in a progressive time.

Referencing plus-size actress Danielle Brooks and singer Lizzo, Holliday said that “people are actually listening, and things are changing” - despite the political and social climate we’re in.

As for when she feels most confident, Holliday said it’s when she’s modelling, as she can be the person she’s always dreamed of being.

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“And I’m creating something that’s going to be around much longer than me, something that brings more visibility to the world so little kids and women feel represented,” she said.

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