New mother tells husband to cancel ‘bros-only’ trip months after daughter’s birth
‘I’ve been feeling overwhelmed,’ new mother says
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Your support makes all the difference.A new mother asked her husband to cancel his “bros-only” trip a few months after she gave birth to their daughter.
In a post shared to the Am I the A**hole forum on Reddit, the 30-year-old woman explained that after she gave birth to her first child and daughter Olivia two months ago, she asked her husband, Jake, to cancel a trip to help her with their newborn. She noted he’s been “incredibly supportive during the pregnancy” and promised to “be there every step of the way” throughout the first few months postpartum, but the upcoming, week-long trip with his friends leaves her alone with the baby.
“Jake and his friends had been planning a “bro’s only” trip for this summer—a week-long vacation to a cabin in the mountains for hiking, fishing, and bonding,” the woman wrote. “When the trip was being discussed, I reminded Jake that Olivia would only be a few months old, and we would be deep in the newborn phase. He reassured me that if things got too tough, he would cancel the trip to help me out, and I trusted him.”
Since giving birth, adjusting to their new lifestyle as parents has been difficult.
“Between the sleepless nights, breastfeeding struggles, and just trying to adjust to motherhood, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed,” she admitted, writing that she asked Jake to cancel his trip because of this. “Last week, I asked Jake if he could consider canceling the trip, reminding him of his promise. I told him that I’m struggling and that having him gone for a whole week would be really tough on me.”
Jake was taken aback, she wrote: “He seemed surprised and a bit hurt that I was asking him to cancel. He said he’s been looking forward to this trip for months, and that he needs a break, too. He also pointed out that his parents live nearby and could help if I needed support while he was away.”
She explained that now they are at a bit of “a standoff.”
In the comment section, people were quick to take her side in the situation.
“He needs a break? What about [the new mom] needing a break?” one person wrote. “Is he going to step up and take the kid for a week while she gets some much-needed R&R after maintaining and pushing out a kid, or is he going to run immediately to his parents for help?”
“This is his baby. He should be physically there, not just supporting you, but taking care of his own child who I must assume you are still recovering from carrying and giving birth to,” another added. “You are not being unfair. He is being … a liar? What do we call people who say they’ll do something and then pitch a fit when you expect them to actually do it?”
In an update to the situation, the woman wrote that her husband eventually apologized and called his friends to tell them he wouldn’t be able to make it.
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