New Films: Kiss Me Guido Directed by Tony Vitale (15)

A tiresome story of macho Italian American Frankie (Nick Scotti) who decides to escape the Bronx by answering a small ad for a GWM to share a Manhattan apartment. What's wanted is a Gay White Male rather than a Guy With Money, but rather than swaggering out of Warren's apartment, Frankie sticks around to have some threadbare fun with class and gender stereotypes.

This leaden, low-budget debut by writer-director Tony Vitale lacks wit, style and acting talent, creating a comedy as broad as it is unfunny. And as if poking fun at "Guidos" and queers weren't enough, the film even manages to make its one female character into a two-dimensional monster for the men to laugh at. As with Tony Richardson's The Mourner, there's something here to offend everyone, but at least that film was worth seeing.

`Close Up' opens today at the ICA, London SW1 (0171-930 3647); all the other films reviewed here are on general release from today.