Mother refuses to force her children to share toys: ‘They deserve the same respect as adults’

The mother-of-two hides her children’s ‘personal’ toys when their friends come to visit

Ellie Muir
Wednesday 15 February 2023 05:48 GMT
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A mother said she refuses to force her kids to share and has separate “personal” and “community” toys for them to play together with.

Mother-of-two Emily Feret, 30, doesn’t make her children – Hannah, four, and Levi, two – share their personal toys or possessions with each other or friends.

She hides her children’s toys when friends come over to play and leaves out “community” toys, which anyone can play with.

The stay-at-home mum said she follows a gentle parenting approach and said she treats her children “like people” and with “respect”.

Ferret, who lives with her husband Greg, a salesman, tries to avoid yelling and shouting and gives her kids correlated consequences – such as taking a toy away that her children are arguing over.

The mother, from Chicago, Illinois, US, told SWNS: “As an adult if I didn’t want to share something, no one would force me to.

“So I give my kids the same respect,” she said, adding: “I treat my children like people.”

“I ask them if any toys they don’t want to share and put them away if guests are coming over.

The mother of two puts away her children’s ‘personal’ toys when their children visit
The mother of two puts away her children’s ‘personal’ toys when their children visit (Emily Feret / SWNS)

“I have toys which are just individually theirs and toys which I call community toys which are everybody’s.

Feret tries to give her children correlated or natural consequences if they are doing something wrong.

She said: “If they are fighting over a community toy I’ll offer a solution such as a timer so they each have a bit of time with the toy.

“If they are still fighting, I’ll then take the toy away.

“I try and make the consequence make sense to the situation.

“If my kids are running and I tell them to stop because they may fall and they don’t listen and then fall that’s a natural consequence.”

Feret tries to talk to her kids calmly and avoids raising her voice.

She said: “I try and get on their level and talk calmly.

“If I do raise my voice I’ll apologise and explain why I yelled.

“I let them be upset and frustrated and tell them the names for these emotions,” Feret added.

Additional reporting from SWNS.

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