Lyric Sheets: Cool Britannia

Next year, the British Tourist Authority will publish The Rock and Pop Map of Great Britain. The map will contain thousands of entries and is part of a strategy to attract young visitors.

Is this the map

Which shows the place

Where Lennon got into a fight?

Or formed a band

Which took the world

Now where was that?

Is this the site?

The art school

And the damp cafe

The map should feature that

The chip bag strewn rehearsal room

The sleeping bag clogged flat

The ballroom turned to Bingo Hall

The long-demolished bar

Where Townshend trashed a ceiling

Or Jonesy mauled guitar

In Nottingham or Birmingham

In Manchester or Leeds

Where sounds sprang up

From grimy streets

Perennial as the weeds

From pallid post-war pop kids

With trannies glued to ears

Who drove dads to distraction

And drove their mums to tears

Stroll on then foreign pilgrim

To Euston where the train

Disgorges northern hopefuls

Into the London rain

And wonder how a nation

Of clumsy awkward sods

Emerging from those cellars

Can turn themselves to gods