How to increase your sex drive, according to an orgasm expert

She also claims some women are incapable of orgasming

Rachel Hosie
Monday 10 April 2017 09:57 BST
Comments
(Getty Images)

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

Some people are, ahem, in the mood all the time. Others, well, aren’t. And differing sex drives can be an issue in relationships.

There could, however, be one simple way to make yourself want to jump into bed with your partner though: go for a run.

According to neuroscientist Dr Nicole Prause, this is a way of almost tricking yourself into feeling like you can’t resist your partner.

“Generally speaking, if your heart rate is increased and you see your partner, you’re more likely to interpret your excitement as due to your partner. Even if it’s not,” Dr Prause told The Times.

She also revealed that there’s no such thing as an aphrodisiac and recommends sexting while at work: “Starting to be sexual and talking about fantasies. That may help get things started.”

What’s more, the 38-year-old believes arousal has become more responsive and less spontaneous than it used to be, which means you might sometimes have to start engaging in sexual stimulation before you really want it: “You start hugging, you kiss… you start to have those urges,” she says.

Dr Prause is a female orgasm expert based in Los Angeles, who spends her days measuring the brain responses of patients while they orgasm.

She believes the UK is more open than our more prudish American neighbours across the pond, and concedes that there’s still a lot more scientific research to be done into orgasms.

And the female orgasm in particular.

“The male genitals are just easier to measure. We already understand quite a lot about how the penis works, because it is so accessible,” Dr Prause says.

“It is literally just harder to study the vagina because it’s internal. The types of imaging, when you can get access to them even, aspects are blocked by the bladder.”

However she concedes that there are other reasons we know less about female sexuality such as: “guy stuff, basic sexism issues, seeing male sexuality as more important.”

Dr Prause believes that relaxing is key to orgasming: “You have to release control. So if you’ve got the laundry list going through your head, ‘I’ve got to pick up the kids soon, before I get the car, I’ve got to do the oil change’, there will be no orgasm in your life.”

Disappointingly, Dr Prause claims that 15 to 20 per cent of women are physically unable to orgasm, which is known as being “anorgasmic”.

It’s not all bad news though, as women are apparently having much better sex than we were decades ago. Dr Prause says women are: “More desired, less functional, more likely to initiate sexual encounters, more likely to report orgasms from sexual encounters.”

What’s more, our ability to orgasm is actually hereditary, Dr Prause reveals: “Orgasm is heritable; that means that, genetically, people whose mums had orgasms and orgasmed more consistently are more likely to orgasm themselves.”

Whether you feel bold enough to ask your mother about her orgasmic history is your call.

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in