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‘I tried to create a steady heartbeat’: Sarah Jessica Parker says she was ‘angry’ at reaction to Robert Downey Jr relationship
The former couple dated from 1984 to 1991
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Your support makes all the difference.Sex and the City star Sarah Jessica Parker has reflected on her seven-year relationship with Robert Downey Jr, which took place while the Iron Man star was struggling with drug and alcohol addiction.
Parker, 58, dated Downey Jr, also 58, from 1984 to 1991. The former couple have both previously said that Downey Jr’s substance abuse led to the end of their relationship.
Meanwhile, Parker did not do drugs and drank little alcohol. In a new interview, she said that her and Downey Jr’s dynamic made her “feel like a parent at the age of 22”.
“People around him would be dismissive of me, but I had given him stability and tried to create a steady heartbeat that allowed him to show up on time,” she told The New Yorker in an interview published on Monday (19 June).
She said the way people spoke about her relationship made her feel “angry and embarrassed”.
Parker has previously spoken about how she felt more like a parent than a partner during her relationship with Downey Jr.
She also said that it has affected the way she parents her children, twins Tabitha and Loretta and son James Wilkie, who she shares with husband Matthew Broderick.
Speaking to People in 2020, the Hocus Pocus star said: “Maybe it taught me a little bit about being a parent too, because the things that I ended up caring about, and the way I cared for Downey, were things that might be more suitable for a parent at a certain point.”
The pair first met as co-stars on the set of Firstborn in 1984 and became a couple. Years after Parker called time on the relationship, Downey Jr continued his battle with addiction and was in and out of rehabilitation centres.
In 1999, he served 12 months in prison after repeatedly missing court-ordered drug tests. He has been sober since 2003.
Downey Jr has previously spoken about his relationship with Parker and acknowledged how important her support had been during the difficult time.
He told Parade magazine in 2008: “I liked to drink, and I had a drug problem, and that didn’t jibe with Sarah Jessica, because it is the furthest thing from what she is.
“She provided me a home and understanding. She tried to help me. She was so miffed when I didn’t get my act together. Private stuff aside, we were able to spend some time together and it was really cool.”
In 2015, Downey Jr revealed that he and Parker reunited in New York to get “closure”.
During an appearance on The Howard Stern Show, the Tropic Thunder star said: “You know, the funny thing too is you always have a perception of somebody that you spent a big chunk of your life with and I think it’s typical… that the further you get away from that in your new relationship, you sub-intentionally taint your perception of the person.
“Seeing her I was like, ‘She’s so great and so cool and so funny and so in command’. I got to meet her kids and I saw the way she and Matthew live and I respect both of them so much.”
Downey Jr is currently married to Susan Downey. The couple wed in 2005 and share two children, Exton Elias and Avri Roel. He also has a son from his previous marriage to Deborah Falconer.
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, you can visit Frank for support and advice. You can also call the Frank drugs helpline on 0300 123 6600.
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