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Cariad Lloyd explains why you ‘never’ get over losing a romantic partner

'That’s not to say you won’t be happy,' says comedian

Olivia Petter
Wednesday 04 December 2019 17:51 GMT
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Comedian Cariad Lloyd has said that people never get over the death of a romantic partner and that thinking otherwise could be hugely detrimental.

Speaking on The Independent‘s dating and relationships podcast, “Millennial Love“, the “Griefcast“ podcast host explained that it can be harmful when people try to limit another person’s grieving period.

“I think people like to think, ‘oh maybe after 3 years they’ll be cool about it’. No, they will always be sad about this,” Lloyd said.

Lloyd, who lost her father and speaks to celebrity guests about grief on her weekly podcast, said that people will of course move on and have another partner, they will “never” get over the loss of someone they loved.

To explain this further, the comedian compared grief to losing a leg.

“It’s a crap metaphor but if you lost your leg, you might adapt to not having that leg. You’d be completely fine and happy but you’d always be like, 'Oh yeh, I used to have a leg. That’s what was there'."

Lloyd went on to say how some people often don't understand this if they haven't gone through grief themselves, noting how they will point out that it's been one year since the death and say they're unsure why the griever is still talking about it.

"You don't hear parents saying, 'Oh my child is three I don’t know why they still live me," Lloyd added. "And you wouldn't turn around to your parents and say, 'I don’t need you to love or care about me anymore'. Like, relationships are relationships. If you love people, you love people.

"You will always miss them. You will always wish that they were a part of your life."

Elsewhere in the episode, Lloyd debunks some of the myths surrounding the grieving process and explains why she believes the Kübler-Ross model, aka the five stages of grief, is outdated and fundamentally misguided because it was created for terminally ill cancer victims.

You can listen to the full episode here.

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