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Mother questions if parents should attend their children’s playdates, sparking debate

‘I don’t expect parents to stay at my house if I invite kids over,’ one parent responds on TikTok

Amber Raiken
New York
Thursday 15 August 2024 22:11 BST
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Mother sparks debate about children’s drop-off playdates
Mother sparks debate about children’s drop-off playdates (TikTok / @aimeesieh)

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A mother has sparked a debate about children being dropped off at adult-supervised playdates, rather than being accompanied by their parents.

In a recent video shared to TikTok by parent Aimee Sieh, she explained her thoughts about adults joining their children for playdates. “What ages do moms not go to play dates anymore?” she asked.

She then prefaced that she was in “kind of a weird situation” and wasn’t sure “how to feel about it.” The parent shared details about her six-year-old son Tatum, who knows his mother’s phone number and has “given it to his friends at school” before to set up playdates.

The mother then explained how one of her son’s friends, who she referred to as Fred, wanted to schedule a playdate.

“Fred gave his mom my number and she texts me saying, ‘Fred really wants to get together for a playdate, let’s set one up,’” she continued. “We choose a Saturday for a playdate.”

Forty-five minutes before the playdate, which was scheduled for 1pm, she learned that Fred’s grandmother was going to bring him over to Sieh’s home instead of his mother. However, she said that she was confused when Fred’s grandma didn’t stick around for the playdate.

“I don’t know these people, I have never met them before. When I got that text, I thought the grandma was going to be staying,” Sieh explained. “But now the grandma dropped him off. Hasn’t even like looked inside my house to check that we’re not complete weirdos.”

While she sent Fred’s mother a video of him and Tatum playing outside together, she said that “hours and hours had passed by” and she didn’t hear back from Fred’s parent. Sieh then texted his mother again, asking what time he’d be picked up and if he needed to stay for dinner.

Although the mother responded that she’d pick up her son in 15 minutes, which she did, Sieh emphasized that the playdate did not go “how she expected” it to.

“I expected her to show up with him, have a playdate for like an hour, hour and a half, then for them to leave,” she said. “Maybe I’m just making a big deal out of it because I’m protective mama bear. But I wouldn’t drop my six-year-old at somebody’s house that I’ve never met before.”

After asking viewers to share their thoughts about the playdate in the caption, she also wrote: “The kid was so good the whole time but the situation felt a little off to me…”

The video has quickly gone viral with more than 687,800 views. In the comments, multiple people agreed with Sieh, saying it was a bit strange that Fred’s mother wasn’t there for the playdate, especially when the two parents hadn’t met beforehand.

“When you say ‘playdate’  I think moms get together, quick play for the kids. Otherwise, it’s ‘Fred mentioned he wanted to come over and play, would that be ok?’ Not is bizarre,” one wrote.

“Nope my son is 11 and he’s not allowed in a house without me meeting the parents and getting to know them,” another commented.

A third shared: “I’ve gone to people’s houses who expected me to drop off my daughter and I awkwardly stayed. They were uncomfortable, but I’m not leaving my kids with someone I don’t know!”

However, other people disagreed with Shieh, saying they’d often just drop their children off for playdates, rather than staying for the occasion.

“I don’t expect parents to stay at my house if I invite kids over. I’m antisocial. Kids go play I just monitor,” one parent wrote.

“I have kids that are over 18 now. I never attended a play date in their life... it was always just drop one off or someone would drop theirs with us. Maybe it’s a generational thing??” another commented.

“It’s odd for a first-time play date but I honestly don’t remember my mom going to any of my playdates or my friends’ moms coming to our house at all either,” a third person responded.

The Independent has contacted Sieh for comment.

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