‘You lose your sense of self’: Kirsty Young says chronic pain condition caused her to question her own identity
BBC presenter appeared in a special Christmas Day episode of ‘Desert Island Discs’ with Lauren Laverne, where she spoke about her struggles with fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis
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Your support makes all the difference.Kirsty Young has spoken of how a chronic pain condition caused her to question her own identity.
The veteran presenter hosted nearly 500 editions of BBC Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs between 2006 and 2018 before she left the show to undergo treatment for fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis.
Interviewed by Lauren Laverne – who took over her presenting role – in a special edition of the programme on Christmas Day, Young revealed that she is feeling “so much better”.
She also described how she spent a year seeing various specialists to try to work out the nature of her condition, until she found a “brilliant” professor of rheumatology who was able to diagnose her.
Fibromyalgia, also called fibromyalgia syndrome (FMS), is a long-term chronic condition that causes pain all over the body, according to the NHS.
Rheumatoid arthritis is described as a long-term condition that causes pain, swelling and stiffness in the joints.
The professor also warned Young that she had to take her condition “seriously” and reduce the stress in her life as well as undergoing medical treatment if she wanted to get better.
“It was said with extreme kindness, but it was just a moment of absolute reality and clarity, and I remember I pulled my car over and just had a good old – to use a good Scottish word – a good old greet [cry], and I thought, ‘Right, well, them’s the facts and you’re really going to have to think about this,’” she said.
“I’m very aware, in talking about this, [that] people sit opposite physicians and get diagnoses that are much more serious than the one I got, but it’s a very painful thing, and I was in pain, and a chronic long-term pain condition is an absolute pain, literally and metaphorically, to deal with.
“It grinds you away, you lose your personality, you lose your sense of humour, you lose your sense of self. There’s all sorts of things that go with it. It’s awful. So I had to take it seriously if I was going to get better. So, I did.”
Young said she felt “very shaky” at the thought of leaving a job she “absolutely loved” and had originally planned on doing until she was made to leave.
“I thought, if I’m not that, what am I for? What is a Kirsty for? I did feel that,” she said. “That was ridiculous, obviously, because to use that well-worn phrase, ‘The cracks are where the light gets in,’ and all sorts of other things happened that were good things.
“At that moment, you kind of lose yourself. And when you’re in chronic pain you sort of lose yourself anyway, so there’s a lot going on.”
Young was able to return to present this year’s BBC coverage of the late Queen Elizabeth II’s platinum jubilee celebrations in February, as well as the closing moments of the monarch’s funeral at St George’s Chapel in Windsor.
“The Queen’s funeral has surely exemplified her reign,” an emotional Young said during the broadcast. “She united us in one final act of togetherness. Unifying the United Kingdom – and indeed the world beyond – in respect, ceremony and significance.”
Young told Laverne: “I did really have a bit of a moment. It was emotional.”
Reflecting on the appeal of Desert Island Discs as it celebrates its 80th year, she said: “I once described it as [having] a sort of hammock-like quality, just to fit itself around the person who is there.
“So therefore, if it is a Premier League footballer, or if it is an astrophysicist, their music, and the amount of time you spend talking to them, and then also the ways in and the ways out of the museum, are sort of beautifully soft and comfy.
“So people come into the studio and they’re kind of surrounded by their own bits of furniture, and the music, so they’ve got the comfort of that familiarity, and also whatever they choose gives each programme a unique flavour.”
The full interview with Kirsty Young on Desert Island Discs will air on BBC Radio 4 and BBC Sounds on Christmas Day at 11.15am.
Additional reporting by Press Association
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