Woman sparks debate after missing brother’s gender reveal for party bus birthday

‘Unbelievable that people are coming from other states just to see if the cupcakes are pink or blue’

Brittany Miller
New York
Wednesday 20 September 2023 22:03 BST
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Related: Couple in Brazil dyes waterfall blue for gender reveal party

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Gender reveal parties have been a decades-long tradition that people either love or hate.

A woman has revealed that she ended up missing her brother’s gender reveal party for his first child to go to a friend’s birthday party on a party bus instead. She then took to the popular Reddit forum “Am I the A**hole” to see whether or not she was in the wrong.

In the post, she explained that the date for the party bus was decided on first, and that she’d informed her brother that she wouldn’t be free on that specific date. “We met up at my mom’s house early September for dad’s birthday and he and his girlfriend were mentioning the upcoming gender reveal in October,” the Reddit poster explained.

“I told him a specific date in October that I already had an event to go to,” she continued. “A friend of mine is celebrating her birthday by bar hopping downtown in a party bus. We are all going to share the cost since it was quite expensive.”

After telling her brother her plans, she said he “assured” her that the party would be on a Sunday so there wouldn’t be any conflicts with both events. The Reddit poster then revealed that, when her brother sent the invite, she was surprised to see the gender reveal party date was the exact same date as the birthday party.

“I responded by asking why it was on Saturday and that I had a previous commitment that I had RSVP to,” she said. “His response was ‘I guess a party bus is more important than a gender reveal.’ I reminded him that we had already talked about it. My aunt chimed in reminding us that it is her and another cousin’s birthday.”

Despite more than one person letting the brother know that they had prior events for that day, he seemed to not care, according to the Reddit poster. “He said that he will not change the date because some of his girlfriend’s relatives are coming from other states,” she wrote.

Many people went to the comments section to defend the sister for missing her brother’s party. “You had plans,” one person’s comment began. “You told him you were busy on a specific date. It doesn’t matter what the plans are - you already made them before he planned this. It’s an invitation, not a summons. You aren’t required to go.”

“One, you had plans that they were made aware of in advance. Two, they [are wrong] for having a gender reveal in the first place. Why does everyone expect you to have two parties these days??? No. You get one - the baby shower. That’s it,” another person wrote.

A third person agreed, writing, “He picked the one date when you said you weren’t available. He’s the AH for not taking that into account. As for his comment about a party bus apparently being more important than a gender reveal, I’d say most things are more important than gender reveals. Unbelievable that people are coming from other states just to see if the cupcakes are pink or blue.”

Other people used their comment to question why gender reveal parties happen at all. “I can’t believe we have like a whole industry involving gender reveals. No one gives a d**n if you have a boy or a girl. We care that you have a healthy baby and a safe delivery. It’s just a party to me and parties aren’t mandatory,” someone else wrote.

Another person agreed, writing, “Gender reveals are the most idiotic of invented events and if I were invited to one, I’d find a reason not to go.”

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