The pizza lanyard is the only accessory you need
Somewhere an old Italian man is weeping

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Your support makes all the difference.Don’t you hate it when you’re eating a slice of pizza, but there’s nowhere to store the next slice you’re eyeing up? I mean it’s not like they come in boxes or anything?
Fortunately, the aptly named StupidIdiotic have got your back, selling a ‘Pizza Pouch’ for $8 that allows you to keep and carry a backup slice.
It has a durable zip-lock to keep your pie fresh, and a neck-strap so you can proudly wear it round your neck like a lanyard, guaranteeing you success on all dates and access to 95% of corporate functions, probably.
Just look at the model in the picture, he’s absolutely delighted with his new accessory.

The lanyard can also be used to hold other triangular-shaped objects, and for flagellating yourself for frittering away all of your income on pointless sh*t.
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