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Couple sparks backlash after bragging about child-free lifestyle
‘We don’t have to ask our family for financial help or watch our kid when we wanna go out,’ couple says
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Louise Thomas
Editor
A married couple has opened up about what they get to do on a regular basis with dual incomes and no children.
Lilly Anne and her husband Evan, both 21, recently took to TikTok to participate in the platform’s latest trend called “we’re of course”. As part of the trend, people pick a group that they’re a part of (like sisters, twins, couples, etc) and then list assumed traits about themselves. Lilly’s video was about her and her husband being “DINKs,” which stands for dual income no kids.
“We’re DINKs,” Lilly said in her most recent video. “We’re gonna get asked daily when we plan on having kids.” Her husband then chimed in, saying: “We’re DINKs! Of course we’re gonna go out to eat every night after work.”
Other lines included: “We don’t have to ask our family for financial help or watch our kid when we wanna go out,” and “We are going to go to Costco and buy all the snacks that we want.”
The couple also mentioned being able to spend their money on what they want and that Evan can go to every football game, in addition to playing golf for as long as he wants.
Since being posted two days ago, on 4 December, the TikTok has received over three million views, with many commenters arguing that all of those activities are still possible with children.
“Got a kid, we still do all this,” one comment began. “While living in a camper and travelling wherever we want.”
Another commenter agreed, writing: “Wait, kids don’t allow you to do these things? My wife and I must be doing something right.”
“I have two kids and still do all these things,” a third commenter pointed out.
In respones to the commentary, many viewers urged Lilly and Evan to ignore critics and to keep doing what they’re doing. “Do it! Live it up. Travel, play and do what you want while you are young. Worry about kids later,” one commenter wrote.
Another commenter agreed that the two of them should wait to have children and not be judged for it. “Live your lives until you’re ready,” they said.
The TikTokers aren’t the only ones to talk about their lives without children. Jackie Dives is another influencer who shares videos of her everyday life, but markets them as “child-free” as she doesn’t plan on starting a family.
One of her videos features Dives sitting down and explaining some of the hate she’s received on her videos, as she said that people tell her it doesn’t make “a difference” if she mentions that she’s child-free or not. She went on to respond to this criticism and expressed that she wants women to “see what a life without children can look like”.
Dives continued in the video about her decision to leave her long-term partner because he had wanted children. “My partner decided that he wanted to have children,” she said. “We’d been together for five years, and he actually left our relationship. So I had to decide [and] be very, very sure that I was willing to let my partner go in exchange for living a child-free life. I really loved my partner a lot.”
Despite her friends pushing her to make this sacrifice for her relationship, she stood by her beliefs. “I knew in my heart and in my gut that I didn’t want to be a parent,” she continued.
“But after we separated, it was really hard for me to visualise what my life would look like. I could see what my life would look like if he and I had stayed together. I would be with him and we’d have a house, and a baby, and a family, and great in-laws, and a white picket fence, the whole thing.”
“I want women who don’t want to have kids to have an example of what your life can look like,” Dives concluded.
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