DILEMMAS / He doesn't have a best friend to tell him: Now, who will be honest with a lonely man?

GEORGE is 35. Brought up by his grandparents, he never managed to make friends at school, except with one boy who lived next door. They played constantly, but at 18 his friend joined the Army and hasn't been seen since. His only other friends were his cousins, who still live nearby.

Starting as a clerk in a small company, George worked his way up to become a manager. Although he joins colleagues for the occasional drink after work - and enjoys himself - he never seems to be included in any other social occasions, and if he suggests an outing to work colleagues they politely turn him down.

He met his wife through a dating agency. After two years of what he thought was a happy marriage, she suddenly announced she didn't love him any more and left, much to his unhappiness and astonishment. He works part time at weekends in an old people's home, where he is idolised. One motherly resident can't understand his lack of social life, and swears he is nice-looking and delightful company.

Now George has discovered that one person in his department has asked for a transfer, and it turns out this is because he finds George so difficult to get along with. George has begged another colleague in the office to tell him what his shortcomings are, but he seemed too embarrassed to say anything. Looking back, George realises that in the past burgeoning friendships have always died in the bud, and some people have even ostracised him.

For instance, when he recently asked his cousin and her family over for a barbecue she said she would ring back, but never did. George is getting extremely worried about his personality. How can he discover his faults if others are to shy to tell him face to face?

Please send your comments and suggestions to Virginia Ironside, Features Department, The Independent, 40 City Road, London EC1Y 2DB; fax 071-956-1739, by Tuesday morning. She will report back next Thursday.