Women are sharing their dating red flags to help others avoid bad relationships

If a partner has no close friends, it is usually a bad sign 

Chelsea Ritschel
in New York
Friday 24 August 2018 22:13 BST
Comments
Women are sharing dating red flags to look out for (Stock)
Women are sharing dating red flags to look out for (Stock)

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In the beginning of a relationship, the rose-coloured glasses of love can make it difficult to pick up on any warning signs that indicate your partner may not have the best of intentions - or aren’t ready for a committed loving relationship.

These red flags are usually easy to spot if you know what to look for.

To ensure others can identify warning signs in their relationships, women are sharing their dating red flags for the “good of womankind.”

The cautionary tales are being shared on Mumsnet after one woman said she needed to be “constantly reminded” of red flags after ending another “nightmare relationship.”

While many of the red flags are ones that you would expect - lying, cheating, narcissistic behaviour - others are more subtle signs that women should be aware of when looking for a partner.

According to one woman, how a partner acts during a disagreement says a lot about them - and if they deal with conflicting views poorly, it is a red flag.

“Since being a teen and thus starting to formulate adult views on things, I have always taken note of people's behaviour when you disagree. It's easy to get along when you're agreeing on things but you learn a lot about someone when you disagree,” she said.

Multiple women said that a partner with no close friends is also a red flag - as it can lead to over-dependency.

If your own friends dislike the person you are dating it should also be a warning sign, according to a woman who shared the moment she realised her friends wouldn’t like her partner.

She said: “For me, the first tiny warning bell was when I found myself ‘editing’ what I told my friends about the relationship, because I didn’t want them to get ‘the wrong idea’ about him.

“The reality was that they would have got exactly the right idea about him.”

Gut instinct is also important in a relationship - and you should always follow it if you feel uneasy, according to one woman.

“If it doesn’t feel right, then it’s not right. If you get a warning feeling, just back off and take a break to think about it. This won’t put a genuine man off you, actually the opposite,” she said.

Other red flags include never giving their full attention, being late, never apologising for hurting your feelings, and referring to their exes as “crazy.”

Many of the red flags are backed by experts - who agree that red flag behaviours are signs of a deeper issue in the relationship and should be taken seriously.

According to psychologist Dr Patrick Keelan, people often notice red flags early in a relationship but choose to overlook them.

“The problem with this rationalising is that behaviours which prompt you to have immediate and strong negative thoughts and feelings usually point to your having significant problems with this person and the relationship down the road,” he said.

Additionally, he said: “​Regardless of their good qualities, the negativity you experience as a result of their red-flag behaviours and characteristics are likely to leave you involved in a relationship which is at best unpleasant and at worst, toxic.”

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Although each relationship is different, certain relationship red flags should make you step back and contemplate your partner’s motives.

If your partner isn’t treating you like they should, it is best to follow your instinct and walk away.

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