Clubbing is dead... LONG LIVE CLUBBING

SPECIAL 4-PAGE INTERNATIONAL CHRISTMAS CLUBBING GUIDE THE PARTY STARTS HERE The biggest, brightest and best dance floors this Christmas and New Year, selected by Cayte Williams and Ben Osborne. Pictures by Jamie B

In 1997, house music became the light entertainment of the clubbing world. The warning signs were there last New Year, when clubs throughout the country offered prize draws of anything from a bottle of champagne to a Mini. On the dance floor, girls (dressed in long slinky dresses and gold strappy sandals) were dead-ringers for game-show totty, while the boys jiggled uncomfortably to an instantly-forgettable thump-thump bass line, hoping they'd get lucky. It was Name That Tune meets Blind Date.

So, what went wrong? What happened to experimentation, excitement and ingenuity? "This has been the hardest year for dance music since 1987," says Ben Turner, of Muzik magazine, "and a lot of people think the whole scene has come to an end. It would be more exciting if a lot of promoters and DJs who have been here too long got out the way. The old guard have had their time."

Certainly there is a handful of elite, over-exposed, over-hyped and over- paid DJs who are now household names: Jeremy Healy is the Des O'Connor of house, Boy George is the Max Bygraves of corporate club culture. Some DJs don't even turn up to provincial clubs where they have top-name billing, and promoters are understandably peeved. "We paid a fortune for the big DJs," says one small-time promoter, "and we didn't get any more people coming along than for the regulars. Last year, one big-name DJ cancelled and most of the clubbers didn't even notice, even though we put up posters saying they weren't playing. I heard one clubber saying 'so-and-so was brilliant tonight,' but they'd danced to our resident DJs all night. There is a certain mafia of DJs and agents who control the circuit and people are starting to get pissed off."

But, dear reader, before you throw away this club guide, here is the good news. In 1997, an increasing number of UK clubs opened a second, smaller dance floor to music that was much more exciting. If the main room is light entertainment, the back room is a revolutionary documentary, charting the rise in big beat (techno meets hip-hop meets rock) and speed garage (Pinky & Perky on acid let loose with a drum machine).

Pioneers of big beat such as DJs Fat Boy Slim and Midfield General and clubs Athletico in London and Brighton's Big Beat Boutique, have made a jaded dance crowd happy again. Dreem Teem and Tuffjam have led the speed garage revolution at clubs like Twice As Nice and The Temple, and the next sound wave for 1998 will be indie dance. "It's where your classic rock set-up - guitars, bass and voice - turns out 10-minute dance grooves," says i-D club writer, Tobias Peggs. "It's not even a back-room phenomenon yet, but DJs John Carter and Richard Fearless are mixing it up in their sets." The indie dance bands on everybody's lips are the Lo-Fidelity Allstars and Campeg Velocett, and rumour has it that the big labels are sharpening their teeth for a feeding frenzy. London club nights Skint on Fridays at The End and Heavenly Jukebox at Turnmills are already on indie dance's case. Even house DJs are dropping in indie dance beats to break up the monotony.

Big beat, indie dance and speed garage are for people who want to dance without chemical assistance. The naffest thing to do in a nightclub this year was to take ecstasy. Moet and lager have replaced bottled water as the drink of discerning clubbers, while the only tablets they'll be taking is aspirin in the morning. The E generation have all grown up, had children or suffered nervous breakdowns. New clubbers are much more sceptical about drugs, not least because the quality has gone down and the chances of getting caught have gone up.

But what if we don't like big beat, speed garage or indie dance? Will we be confined to bungalow (boring house played in provincial super-clubs that you wouldn't go upstairs for)? "It's down to magazines and club promoters to start pushing new names," says Ben Turner. "There are up-and-coming DJs worthy of more attention like tech house DJ Terry Francis, Latin house DJ Lord G, break beat DJ Dave Tipper, DJ EZ who plays speed garage and DJ Heaven from the Ministry of Sound."

Some of these DJs went out to Ibiza this summer, followed by a crowd of 16-year-olds as much into clubbing as the generation before them. 1998 could be the year when we see the demise of a Nineties club phenomenon - the DJ dinosaur - and the rise of a newer, fresher generation. Clubbing is dead. Long live clubbing. Cayte Williams

CENTRAL LONDON

Full Cycle & V Recordings End of Year Party: Club promoters and record label join up for a night of revelry at Mr C's West End venue.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Roni Size, DJ Krust, DJ Die and more play eclectic beats & drum 'n' bass for an appreciative audience

When? Where? How Much?: 19 December/10pm-5am; The End, 18 West Central St, WC1; pounds 12/pounds 10 concs. Ticket hotline: 0171 419 9199.

Sub-Terrain: Lords of funky techno and future house lay down the law at Mr C's comfortable club. It'll be a showcase for The End's in-house record label.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: The man himself heads the bill, along with Derrick Carter, Mark Broom, Murf, Ralph Lawson, Terry Francis, Layo and Deano spin tech-house for relaxed 20-35 crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 26 December/11pm-7am; The End, 18 West Central St, WC1; pounds 13.

Ticket hotline: 0171 419 9199.

Milk 'n' 2 Sugars: House night that is still hugely huggable, the M and 2 S crowd celebrate the Jolly Season with a large dose of festive spirit. This is their debut New Year's Eve party in a central London listed building.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Chicago's Derrick Carter and Dimitri from Paris are joined by Ralph Lawson, the Excellent Bam Bam, Diesel, KCC, Ty Holden, Kenny Charles. Corrina Joseph, from the Basement Jaxx, performs live. Tea will be served at 4am (when else), milk and sugar optional.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9:30-6am; location tba; pounds 30/pounds 25 members.

Ticket hotline: 0181 516 8003. Credit-card bookings on 0171 403 3331.

Pushca presents Drama Queen: Pushca is providing the perfect stage for attention-seeking, decadent darlings. Set in a BBC TV studio, expect a dazzling wonderland of giant gilded bird cages, a glittering unicorn, jewelled white swans and an ice bed.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents Fat Tony, Miss Barbie, Darren Darling and Paul Gardner spin uplifting house and garage for glamour-babes, drag queens and night-stars.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9:30pm-6am; location tba; pounds 40/pounds 35 members in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0171 734 7110.

The Gardening Club Presents Heaven & Hell: We'll be grinning like angels and dancing like devils under the arches at London's most intimate house venue.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: In the Hell room, Leftfield boys Paul Daley and Nic Rapacciolli spin records on the dark side, while in the Angels room the reformed Brandon Block (like we believe you) and Laurence Nelson play heavenly house.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-6am; 4 The Piazza, WC2; pounds 25 in advance.

Ticket hotline: 0171 497 3154.

Sancho Panza's Ideal Home New Year's Eve Party: The party people get their hands on a film studio and create unreal visuals, sumptuous lighting, shag-pile carpets and take over a luxurious penthouse suite.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Matt Brown (Sancho Panza) and Eren (Dirtbox) spin funky techno, big beat, hip hop and drum 'n' bass for a spectacularly dressed crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-7am; tba; pounds 22 and pounds 1 booking fee.

Ticket Hotline: 0171 598 1160. NORTH LONDON Kali's Krismas Kracker: The world's largest Asian lesbian and gay club celebrates the winter solstice with an authentic eastern serving of Bhangra, Bollywood and Arabic flavours. Open to all attitude-free connoisseurs, but arrive early to avoid the queues.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs Ritu and Riz add spice with their mix of Asian- tinged house, soul and swing to a mixed, friendly crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 19 December/10pm-3am; The Dome, Dartmouth Park Hill, N19; pounds 5/pounds 4 concessions/pounds 3 before 11pm.

Midnight Massive: Three (or so) wise women come to Camden bringing Wisdom, Knowledge and Destiny. Wise words will be dished out by rap poet Sibihan.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Maura Miller and Misbehaviour serve up musical knowledge with a fresh, all-female line-up playing r'n'b, new and old skool hip- hop and classic rare groove.

When? Where? How Much?: 24 December/9pm-3am; WKD, Kentish Town Rd, NW1; pounds 10 on the door, pounds 8 in advance.

Ticket hotline: 0171 267 1869.

Freedom presents Hollywoodn't: Freedom's six rooms will be fully themed with costumed characters, including a lecherous director (complete with casting couch). A night of Tinseltown trash, scandals and starlets.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Lisa Pin Up, Graham Gold and Roy the Roach play funky house to nu NRG. Dress to shine like a star.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-8am; Bagley's, Goods Way, N1; pounds 35/pounds 30 members.

Ticket hotline: 0541 514 444.

Trees for London presents Trees in Their Eyes: More fruity frivolity from the Trees people, who use the proceeds to plant trees in inner London. The venue's summer garden will be transformed into a heated winter palace of fun.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs Craig Jensen and Sarah HB spin house for a crowd who are dressed like their favourite star.

When? Where? How Much?: 19 December/10pm-5am; The Cross, Goods Way, N1; pounds 10 in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0171 251 3307.

WKD and Standing Firm present Steppin' 2 '98: WKD's industrial decor could make it cold, but a trendy Camden crowd make it cool.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Funky affair featuring live performances from Raw Stylus, and Martine Girault. Shake Down Brothers, Andy Freaknik and Jazzy M (Jazzbabi) keep the dance floor bumping.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-5am; WKD, Kentish Town Rd, NW1; pounds 20.

Ticket hotline: 0171 267 1869.

Essential New Year's Eve at The Palace: Essential will be more of a festival than a club as some of the hugest names headline at a 12,000- capacity venue.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Black Grape, Roni Size, Chemical Brothers, LTJ Bukem, Headrillaz, Jumping Jack Frost and Giles Peterson play eclectic big beats, drum 'n' bass and ambient in four rooms for everyone aged 18 to 40.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-6am; Alexandra Palace, N22; pounds 39 plus booking fee.

Ticket hotline: 0891 230190.

We Wanna Be The Hair of Your Dog Special: Regular club Kitsch Bitch has its New Year's Day special. For lovers of the trash and glam of Seventies New York.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Bobby Tinfoil, Danny Dogfood and The Chopper Girls play Wayne County, The Ramones and anything they like for a crowd who "get really messy".

When? Where? How Much?: 1 January/8pm-late; Clancey's, Queensland Rd, N7; pounds 2 pay on the door.

Ticket hotline: 0171 607 0896.

The Full Monty: The stars of '97 gather for a speed garage spectacular followed by a New Year's Day party with free champagne at a secret location.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Karl "Tuff Enuff" Brown, Matt "Jam" Lamont, Dreem Teem and Steve Jackson (Kiss FM) spin speed and underground garage for a dressy crowd who love their Bolly.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-8am; The Temple, High Rd, Tottenham, N17; pounds 30 advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0181 808 0808 EAST LONDON The Blue Note New Year's Eve: Hoxton's finest is at it again, with a night that promises to catapult you into 1998.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Eddie Piller (GLR) and Paul Murphy stoke the furnace in the basement while Crispin (Straight No Chaser) and Ali B get things cooking upstairs for a warm, friendly crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-5am; Blue Note, Hoxton Sq, EC1; pounds 30.

Ticket hotline: 0171 729 8440.

Medicine Bar Christmas Party: Islington's trendiest DJ bar decants to Hoxton to provide three floors of festive frolics with PlayStations, mad lights and visuals.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Richard Fearless, Pelli Rocco and Medicine Bar DJs spin big beat, funk and disco licks for a casually glamorous crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 17 December/10.30pm-3am; 333 Old Street, EC1; pounds 5. Ticket hotline: 0171 704 9536.

Exposure Christmas Special: Speed garage mecca gets festive. Expect even more champagne, labels and snow this Christmas.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Regular Freek FM and Ice FM DJs play underground house and garage for a stylish, mixed crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 19 December/11pm-6am; The EC1 Club, Farringdon Rd, EC1; pounds 12/pounds 8 members.

Ticket hotline: 0467 664422.

The Heavenly Christmas Party: It's the club where DJs play what they fancy, so prepare for truly eclectic music...

DJs, Sound & Crowd: John Carter, Richard Fearless and Norman Cook try everything from speed garage to techno and drum 'n' bass. Appreciative groovers range from students to "middle youth".

When? Where? How much?: 20 December/9pm-3.30am; Turnmills, Clerkenwell Rd, EC1; pounds 8 (after 10pm), pounds 5. Ticket hotline: 0171 476 7296.

Athletico Christmas Party: The people who, with Heavenly, introduced London's dance floors to post-house clubbing are preparing another night of messy thrills.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: An excuse for Athletico to show-off their record- label talent, with Psychedelic Smith and Sir Drew playing live sets around Alex Sparrow and Simon Fathead's big beat and hip-hop sets.

When? Where? How Much?: 27 December/10pm-5am, The Blue Note, Hoxton Sq, EC1. pounds 10.

Ticket hotline: 0171 729 8440.

Popstarz New Year's Eve Party: First gay (now mixed) club to play indie is still going strong.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Usual resident DJs spin indie and Eighties trash disco for a drunken, young-at-heart crowd.

When? Where? How much?:

31 December/9pm-6am; The Leisure Lounge, 121 Holborn, EC1; pounds 15/pounds 12 UB40 & NUS.

Ticket hotline: 0171 738 2336.

New Year's Eve at The Powerhouse: Three thousand turned up for the massive Hallowe'en bash and this promises to be better.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Thirty two DJs, including DJ Madness, DJ EZ & MC Rankin, spin speed garage for designer-savvy crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/8pm-8am; The Powerhouse, Waterden Rd, E15; pounds 30 advance tickets only.

Ticket hotline: 0181 533 2781. SOUTH LONDON THK Christmas Day Special: THK Films' final fund-raising bash for their dance movie, will be held in their own purpose-built studio.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Paul Trouble Anderson and 18 DJs spin house and garage for a dressy crowd

When? Where? How Much?: 25 December/8pm-8am; The Imperial Garden, 299 Camberwell New Rd, SE5; pounds 18 advance/pounds 22 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 0171 252 6000.

Dog Star's New Year's Eve Party: Brixton's finest pub goes festive with free champagne for first 200 arrivals and complimentary breakfast for the die-hards.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Jeep Grrlz spin up nu-skool and funky techno, while Jerry Dammers (ex-Specials) plays underground jazz for Brixton's cool, hip 'n' happening crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-midday then stay for Hair of the Dog Star New Year's Day Party from midday to 1am; Dog Star Bar & Cafe, 389 Coldharbour Lane, SW9; pounds 25 advance bookings, pounds 30 on the door.

Ticket Hotline: 0171 733 7515.

Scaramanga: The New Year's Eve Party: There will be two rooms of superb party antics and surprises a-go-go, with live flamenco dancers, a belly- dancer troupe and a cigar bar.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Basement Jaxx will be doing their three-deck extravaganza, alongside Dimitri from Paris as well as soulful live vocals by the legendary Jocelyn Brown.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-6am; The Brix, St Matthew's Church, Brixton, SW9; pounds 25.

Ticket hotline: Tickets from Atlas Records, IS Records and Dog Star.

Return to the Source: If house and garage just leave you cold, try a cocoon of fluoro and Day-Glo with free fruit and sweets, and a marketplace selling clothes and jewellery.

DJ, Sound & Crowd: Mark Allen, Sid Shanti, Medicine Drum live and Paul Thomas (Kiss FM) play trance, drum 'n' bass and break-beat for a touchy- feely crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-6am; Brixton Academy, Stockwell Rd, SW9; pounds 25 advance booking.

Ticket hotline: 0181 674 6003. WEST LONDON Come Dancing present A Night of a Thousand Stars: On New Year's Eve there will be an eruption of lasers, glitter showers and balloons as Big Ben rocks the foundations.

DJ, Sound & Crowd: Mark Jarman (Miss Moneypenny's) spins house before Come Dancing's Val and Des hit the decks. In the second room the party gets a disco trash feel, with Matt Cantor and The Gentlemen's Scooter Club.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9:30pm-5am; Shepherd's Bush Empire, W12; pounds 35.

Ticket hotline: 0181 870 0777.

New Year's Eve at The Paradise: Laid-back bar with Neo-Gothic decor spoils the locals with a free buffet, live music and DJs.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Sugar Loaf and residents spin "a bit of everything" to those sensible Portobello refugees, and there's live jazz and blues downstairs.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/7pm-1am; 19 Kilburn Lane, W10; pounds 12 in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0181 969 0098.

SOUTH EAST BRIGHTON

Big Beat Boutique: Brighton's hippest club is run by the UK's leading big beat label, Skint.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Cut La Roc, Hardknox and the Jedi Knights mess with the beats for a crowd who don't expect to remember a thing the next morning.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm- 3am; The Concorde, Madeira Drive, Brighton; pounds 30.

Ticket hotline: 01273 738527.

HASTINGS

Bedrock Reunion at Hastings Pier: Well established club takes over the famous pier's bars, cafes and ballrooms.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: John Digweed, Danny Howells, Gary and Paul from Menage et Trois play house for a dressed-up crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/9pm-7am; Hastings Pier, Hastings, East Sussex; pounds 25 plus booking fee.

Ticket hotline: 01424 715207. SOUTH WEST BRISTOL

Fandango New Year's Eve Party: Lakota, the five-year-old Bristol outfit, raises the roof once more.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs Disciple, Judge Jules and Norman Jay play New York garage and house to smart clubbers. No anthems! Hooray.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-6.30am; Lakota, 6 Upper York St, Bristol; pounds 27.

Ticket hotline: 0117 929 9008.

Shimmy's New Year: A converted church with capacity for 1,000 that is proud of its "all guns blazing" sound system.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Starecase (live), Luge (Stange Fruit), Andy Stevens and residence spin techno and trip hop (with live saxophonists) to please dedicated 18-50 clubbers.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-6am; New Trinity Hall, Trinity Rd, St Phillips, Bristol; pounds 14/pounds 12 members.

Ticket hotline: 0117 908 5964.

One Love New Year's Ball: The One Love crew return to this luxurious, historic mansion for decadent celebrations.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Two rooms of house and funk are provided by Norman Jay, Daddy G and One Love DJs for a crowd who love to party.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-5:30am; Ashton Court Mansion, Bristol; pounds 28.

Ticket hotline: 0117 973 2968.

BATH

The Big Cheese Christmas Party: The best fancy dressers get crowned King and Queen of Cheese and get a free pass to the club for a month.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Tom Madicott and Nicky play cheesy tunes, Bond themes and Seventies disco for a mixed and student crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 23 December/9pm-2am; Mole's, George St, Bath; pounds 3 on the door/pounds 1.50 if in fancy dress.

Ticket hotline: 01225 404445.

WESTON-SUPER-MARE

Karanga New Year's Eve Party: Celebrate New Year on the waterfront in 2,000-capacity leisure centre with a heated marquee. Licensed bar closes at 2am.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Jeremy Healy, Jon Pleased Wimmin and residents spin classic house, underground garage and hard house for a dressed-up 18-25 crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm 8am; The Tropicana, Marine Parade, Weston-super-Mare; pounds 35 advance tickets only.

Ticket hotline: 01225 447770.

CHELTENHAM

Drum 'n' Bass Christmas Party: Nightclub, pub and chill-out room with video-mixing projections and special guest MCs.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Donovan Smith, Bandit and Joolz spin Drum 'n' Bass and Big Beat for local crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 18 December/9.30pm-2am; Enigma, Regent St, Cheltenham; pounds 5 before 10.30pm/ pounds 6 after.

Ticket hotline: 01242 224085. MIDLANDS MILTON KEYNES

Ultra Vegas and Renaissance Present The Main Event: Mega-complex has marquees, a string quartet, indoor tropical gardens, magicians...and a Vegas- style wedding suite.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Paul Oakenfold, Jon Pleased Wimmin and Boy George play uplifting and progressive house to a glamorous 25-plus crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 26 ecember/9pm-6am; The Club, Winter Gardens, Central Milton Keynes; pounds 22.50 plus booking fee, advance tickets only.

Ticket hotline: 0990 344 4444.

HEREFORD

Naughty But Nice New Year's Eve Party: De Vit plans to bring in the New Year (it's his first gig as the club's monthly resident) at this happy little house club.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Tony De Vit, Andy Passman and Pete Kelly spin hard house and garage for dedicated clubbers.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-2am; Crystal Rooms, Bridge St, Hereford; pounds 12.

Ticket hotline: 01432 267378.

BIRMINGHAM

Flashback's Boxing Day Special: Birmingham's old skool hardcore club offers a special post-Christmas bash.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: They've enticed old skool DJ Keith Suckling back on to the turntables to entertain a young, unpretentious crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 26 December/11am-6am; The Venue, Branston St, Hockley, Birmingham; pounds 8/pounds 7 NUS.

Ticket hotline: 0976 221288.

The Club Country Snow Ball: 2000-capacity club will have rococo-themed decor complete with costume players and live flamingoes.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Danny Rampling, Allister Whitehead and LTJ Bukem spin house, garage and drum 'n' bass for smart clubbers.

Where? When? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-6am; The Que Club, Corporation St, Birmingham; pounds 42.50 advance tickets only.

Ticket hotline: 0121 212 0770.

Athletico v Nutonic New Year's Eve Party: The club that kicked off big beat packs its newish venue for a hip hop, eclectic sound clash.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: The Athletico DJs line-up against the mighty Nutonic to fight it out on the turntables with Simon Fathead, Kirsty McAra, Alex Sparrow vs Toby and Del Agua.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-5am; The Sanctury, Digbeth High St, Birmingham; pounds 15.

Ticket hotline: 01785 224350.

WOLVERHAMPTON

Sundissential's New Year Special: A Sunday club that specialises in 12- hour dance marathons. This one is a double whammy - a 24-hour special.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Tall Paul, Judge Jules and Tony de Vit spin house, anthems and hardcore for an "absolutely mad" crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-6am and January 1/6am-8pm; Pulse Night Club, Hurst St and The Church, Broad St, Birmingham; pounds 42.50 for Pulse/pounds 5 for The Church (but you can only buy tickets for this at the New Year's Eve party).

Ticket Hotline: 01202 399922.

WOLVERHAMPTON

Xmas Eve Party at The Canal: Won Best UK Club Award for 1997, and come midnight, there'll be a live operatic rendition of "Silent Night", balloons and "lots of kissing".

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Chris Anslow, Barney and Kiddo spin house and deep American garage for a dressed-up crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 24 December/ 9.30pm-2.30am; The Canal, British Waterways Yard, Broad St, Wolverhampton; pounds 8 pay on the door.

Ticket hotline: 01902 311312.

Sabotage: Unpretentious, long-running club, the Orbit, stages a one- off New Year's Eve party.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Jeff Mills, Joey Beltram, CJ Bolland plus guests spin techno for a faithful crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-6am; the Studio, Fox's Lane, Wolverhampton; pounds 35 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 01132 349696.

HANLEY

New Year's Eve at Horny: Horny by name, horny by nature and the bar is licenced until 4am.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Gordon Kaye, Pete Bromley and Miss Jo Lively bring the house down with their stomping house, while the crowd go mad for it. Nothing new there, then.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9.30pm-5am; The Void, Glass St, Hanley, Stoke-on-Trent; pounds 23 and booking fee.

Ticket hotline: 01782 283124.

NEWCASTLE-UNDER-LYME

Swoon Presents The Champagne Party: The theme is Fifties Hollywood and there's a free glass of champagne for everyone.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Smokin' Jo, Al MacKenzie and all-girl DJs Femme Fatale spin garage and progressive house for glamorous regulars.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/ 9.30pm-4am; Time and Space, The Midway, Newcastle-under-Lyme; pounds 25 in advance/pounds 30 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 01785 229384.

DERBY

Progress New Year's Eve: Dressed-up club known for its brilliant atmosphere.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Tony De Vit, Jon Pleased and Angel play stomping house to swing your bag to.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-5am; The Eclipse, Babington Lane, Derby; pounds 30.

Ticket hotline: 01332 600700. NORTH MANCHESTER

Bugged Out New Year's Eve Party: The Bugged Out boys and girls put on their dancing shoes for some serious down-to-earth partying.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Cajmere/Green Velvet, Dave Clarke and Mr Scruff spin techno and twisted beats for a crowd who love their BPM.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/ 9.30pm-4am; Sankeys, Ancoats, Jersey St, Manchester; pounds 30/ pounds 25 members.

Ticket hotline: 0161 950 4230.

Golden: Hosting their most prestigious night to date, Golden are laying on four dance floors in two connected venues, decked out by Perfect Decor.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: The house will be pumping in rooms one to four, with DJs Judge Jules, John Kelly, Roger Sanchez & Angel Moraes doing the honours.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-4am; Manchester Academy, Oxford Rd, Manchester; pounds 35.

Stereo's New Year's Eve: Gifts will be passed round, but the main event is the intelligent music. Don't expect any Slade - unless it's an old German import B-side remix.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Mike Chadwick (Jazz FM) and Dean Johnson are joined by Peter Gibson (Django's) and Live saxophones for a night of jazz, funk and soul-inspired beats.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-4am; South, South King St, Manchester; pounds 12, advance tickets from South, Decoy Records, Expansion.

The Rock 'n' Roll Bar New Year's Eve: Manchester's Friday night hang- out for guitar kids moves venue for New Year.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents Phil Beckett and Jeff Thomas are joined by eclectic DJ Andy Votel and a live appearance by Badly Drawn Boy (Manchester's answer to Beck). It's an indie kind of affair, so the lager will be flowing.

When? Where? How Much?: 10pm-4am; Richfields Nightclub, Deansgate, Manchester; pounds 10 from Piccadilly Records or South.

The Big Chill New Year's Eve Special: Beat music's leading festival organisers present a visual and sonic treat, with lighting and effects by Hexstatic.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: The Jimpster's live jazz jam, DJs Guy Gondwana and Galaxy's Matt Thompson provide a night for discerning clubbers with electonica and arthouse drum 'n' bass.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December /10pm-4am; Band on the Wall, Ancoats St, Manchester; pounds 15 advance/pounds 18 on the door.

Ticket Hotline: 0161 832 6625.

LIVERPOOL

Garlands Boxing Night All Nighter: The final all-night fling for gay club Garlands groupies takes on a boxing theme and promises live chained hunks in a winter sports special.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: House DJs Dave and Huey are in the ring with guest star Li'll Jon. Come as Christmas past, present and future.

When? Where? How Much?: 26 December/10pm-6am; Garlands, Eberle St, Liverpool; pounds 15.

Ticket hotline: 0151 236 3307.

Cream's New Year's Eve: All the usual Cream antics - plus some suprises.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs include Paul Oakenfold, Roger Sanchez and the Cream DJs. This will be Paul's last night in the Annex bar.

When? Where? How Much?: 9pm-6am; Nation, 1-3 Parr St, Liverpool; pounds 38.50, including booking fee.

Ticket hotline: 0151 709 1693.

NOTTINGHAM

The Renaissance New Year's Eve Ball: Glam clubbers take over an old lake- side country house, complete with chandeliers. There's a free champagne buffet if you get there before 10.30pm.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Danny Rampling, Dave Seaman plus residents pump out progressive house, break beat and funky disco for a fashionable, clued- up crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-5am; Colwick Hall, Nottingham; pounds 40 advance bookings only.

Ticket hotline: 0113 244 2999.

Zero G New Year's Eve Party: The Zero people recently celebrated one year of spectacular clubbing, combining international DJ celebrities with up-and-coming UK talent.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: French house supremo, Dimitris from Paris joins John Marsh and Allister Whitehead, while Athletico and Arthrob team up in basement for big beat eclectic mayhem.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-3am; Essence, Barraford House, Goldsmith St, Nottingham; pounds 25.

Ticket hotline: 0115 9563 700.

SHEFFIELD

Love To Be, Gatecrasher and Back To Basics: A three-in-one monster night that could hardly fail to shake the house.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Two Chicago legends, Todd Terry and Derrick Carter, turn up for three leading house clubs and make a glam crowd very happy.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-6am; Sheffield Music Factory, Sheffield; pounds 35.

Ticket hotline: 0990 344 4444.

LEEDS

Casa Latina Night in Havana Xmas Salsa Ball: North-east salsa haven spoils the locals with The Casa Latina Allstars, dance exhibitions and salsa classes from 8.30pm-9.30pm

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents Chico Malo and Lubi OJC spin salsa, mambo and Latin house for an enthusiastic crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 18 December/8pm-2am; The Town and Country Club, 55 Cookridge St, Leeds; pounds 8.50/pounds 7.50 non-members.

Ticket hotline: 0113 280 0100.

Up Yer Ronson Christmas Reunion: The UYR crew celebrate the festive season in their usual full-on way.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs Paul Tayor, Neil Metzner and Big Dick Menace (Leeds' answer to Marky Mark) spin happy house.

When? Where? How Much?: 20 December/10pm-4am; The Warehouse, Sommers St, Leeds; pounds 7.

Ticket hotline: 0113 230 5526.

Spice of Life Boxing Day Special: An Ibizan reunion party to take your mind off the stinging Siberian winds blowing in from the moors.

DJs, Sound & Crowd:Tony Onetto joins resident DJ Malcolm Dale to spin hot summer house tunes to a crowd that last saw each other with their kits off on a beach.

When? Where? How Much?: 10pm-4am; Club Uropa, New Brigate, Leeds; pounds 5.

Ticket hotline: 0113 2422224.

Speed Queen New Year's Eve Party: Ex-I-Spy crew strut their fancy-dress stuff. This time, it's a Snow White theme, a fairyland castle and prizes for the best-dressed costume.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Regular residents spin house, speed garage, funk and disco for fun-loving crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/9pm-6am; The Warehouse, Somers St, Leeds; pounds 20 in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0113 246 1033.

HARROGATE

Magic presents The Masquerade Ball: One of those "who am I dancing with?" nights - hopefully leading to a pleasant surprise.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Stomping funk, disco and garage with DJs Greg Robinson, Soulmaster Hazzy and Scott Harris. There is a champagne reception between 8pm and 9pm.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-3am; Club 11, 11 Station Parade, Harrogate; pounds 25/ pounds 20 members.

Ticket hotline: 0113 242 7845. SCOTLAND EDINBURGH

Hogmanay Festival: Now in its fifth year, Edinburgh's New Year street party has become the biggest in the world. Catering for clubbers, culture vultures, foodies, sporties and tourists, the four days of celebration kick off with a torchlight procession and fire festival.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: There will be rock, Latin, salsa, jazz and dance music, street theatre, concerts and two official festival clubs - The Hogmanay Festival Club and the Spiegeltent. Last year the street parties attracted 300,000 people, but the number has been limited to 180,000 this year for safety reasons. All 180,000 passes have already been claimed, so if you're thinking about Hogmanay clubbing in Edinburgh, you may be too late.

When? Where? How much?: 29 December-1 January/ 5.30pm to when the last person goes home; Edinburgh City Centre; free.

Ticket hotline: 0131 473 1998.

The New Year Revels: A club for a tongue-in-cheek take on clubbing.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Featuring live performances by The King (who only does songs by dead people in the style of Elvis), The Spicers, Club Latino, the Robert Fish Ceilidh Band and Tackno.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9.30pm-3.30am; The Assembly Rooms, George St, Edinburgh; pounds 25.

Ticket hotline: 0131 473 1998.

Disco Inferno: The club is situated just outside the street party zone, so you won't need a pass to access it - a definite bonus, as you'll come to appreciate.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents play Seventies retro disco, so it's time to chuck on that fluorescent afro-wig and press your bell-bottoms for this hugely popular joint.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/check time; The Venue, Calton Rd, Edinburgh.

Ticket hotline: Tickets in advance from Virgin and Ripping Records.

GLASGOW

The Arches Hogmanay Collective: The Victorian arches under Glasgow's central railway station is host to three Glasgow clubs.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Twelve DJs include Ministry of Sound's DJ Heaven giving up progressive house to a party crowd with a couldn't-care dress code.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/9pm-5am; The Arches, 30 Midland St, Glasgow; pounds 22.50 in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 0141 221 4001.

Subculture's Famous Hogmanay Hoot: There will be a Piper at New Year but sadly the cardboard of Bruce Forsyth, that used to do the countdown for New Year, got destroyed in the renovations.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJs Harri and Dominic will keep the party pumping with house for a stylish and studenty crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/11pm-5am; Subclub, 22 Jamaica St, Glasgow; pounds 14 in advance/pounds 16 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 0141 248 4600.

Tunnel New Year's Eve: This tends to attract the "wiser" club crowd, who are still young enough to make use of interactive video screens and revel in the debauchery. Champagne is only pounds 1 a throw.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: A Hogmanay hoe-down where Radio 1's Dave Pearce joins Tunnel residents Colin Tevendale and Scott Mackay for some stomping house and a crowd awash with New Year bubbles.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/10pm-4.30am; Tunnel, Mitchell St, Glasgow; pounds 16 advance/pounds 20 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 0141 204 1000.

PERTH

The X-mas Rhumba: The full Christmas Monty, with the last show of the Stress Zeitgeist tour.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Eight hours of the UK's finest house DJs, including Dave Seaman, John Digweed and Tall Paul. The venue will be given a full make-over, and treated with full-on visuals. When? Where? How Much?: 27 December/8pm-4am; The Ice Factory, Perth; pounds 23.50.

Ticket hotline: 01382 581140. WALES CARDIFF

P'TangYangMistletoeand-wine: The club with the strangest name in Britain is Wales' top big beat club.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Lindsey (Sound Scandal), Phantom Beats (Plastic Raygun) and Spider spin tracks for a clued-up crowd and ex-pats home for Christmas.

When? Where? How much?: 20 December/10pm-3am; The Emporium, High St, Cardiff; pounds 5.

Ticket hotline: 01222 664577.

Essence Boxing Day Special: The maddest club in Wales celebrates its third birthday with hot property, Tuffjam.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Matt "Jam" Lamont, Carl "Tuff Enuff" Brown and residents spin underground and classic Garage for clued-up crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 26 December/10pm-4am; Escape, Westgate St, Cardiff; pounds 7/pounds 6 members.

Ticket hotline: 01222 390851.

Time Flies New Year's Eve Party: Club owned by London Emporium has two floors of music. Free glass of champagne until 10.30pm.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Anthony Pappa (Renaissance) and residents spin up- front house, underground and speed garage to a dressy crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/9.30pm-4am; The Emporium, High St, Cardiff; pounds 20 in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 01222 664577

SWANSEA

New Year's Eve at Escape: Welsh bunch go mad and give away free "Escape into the Mix" tape by residents Danny Slade and Big Al.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents spin house, speed garage and ambient for everyone from surfers to secretaries. Guest PA from local veterans Head Jam, plus ambient room.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-4am; Escape, Northampton Lane, Swansea; pounds 17.

Ticket hotline: 01792 652854.

Bubba's New Year's Eve: Local clubs Spacebase and Science join forces for a massive last night of the year. DJ Alfy is at this moment mixing Big Ben chimes into his wicked set.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Chris (Logical Progression) and resident DJs play hip hop, trip hop, funk and drum 'n' bass to mixture of locals, students and skate kids.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-4am; Bubba Club, Dillwyn St, Swansea; pounds 5 on the door.

Ticket hotline: 01792 458689. N IRELAND PORT RUSH

Lush New Year's Eve Party: Clubbers get a free glass of champagne, four dance floors, five bars and drums and pipers at midnight.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: London DJ John Cecchini and resident Colin Hamilton spin house for young, dressy crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8.30pm-2am; Kelly's Complex, Bushmills Road, Port Rush, Co. Antrim; pounds 12/pounds 10 members.

Ticket hotline: 01265 822027. AND THE REST... DUBLIN

Cream at The PoD: One of Dublin's coolest venues with a labyrinth of chill-out rooms plays host to Liverpool's famous club.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Boy George, Judge Jules and Tall Paul play house and garage for ex-pats, chilled-out locals and Guinness-drinking old codgers.

When? Where? How Much?: 23 December/11pm-2.30am; Old Railway Station, Harcourt St, Dublin 2; pounds 10 pay at the door.

New Year's Eve at the Kitchen: Club attached to The Clarence, the U2- owned hotel, is a haunt for Dublin celebrities and star-struck locals. Tonight's host is Miss Candy a "reasonably famous Irish drag queen".

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Residents Podge, Derek M and Shay Hannon spin progressive house for the beautiful people.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/10pm-3am; East Essex St, Temple Bar, Dublin 2; pounds 12 on the door.

AMSTERDAM

HQ Party: Night of live funky techno, hard-house and films.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Techno DJs Darren Price, Paul Jay and Steve Rachmad spin the tunes while The Advent play live to a crowd of Dutch techno boffins. There's a cinema and huge decorations.

When? Where? How much?: 28 December/9pm-5am, Melkweg, Lijnbaansgracht 234A. Fl27.50 (pounds 8).

Ticket hotline: 00 31 20 624 1777.

PARIS

New Year at La Casbah: North African-inspired club famous for its exotic cocktails (and exotic prices) is a key place to go in Paris.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Resident DJs play acid jazz and "free" music to a cooler than cool crowd.

When? Where? How much?: 31 December/11pm-6am; 18-20 rue de la Forge Royale 75011; beware of a snooty door policy.

Ticket hotline: 00 331 43 71 71 89.

NEW YORK

100% Pure at The Roxy: A good place to start clubbing in the Big Apple. A huge space with decadent decor and spectacular drag queens.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Anthony Acid and Stretch Armstong play house and disco classics to down-town trendy "club kids".

When? Where? How much?: 27 December/11pm-5am; 515 West 18th St; $20 (pounds 12.50) at the door.

Ticket hotline: 001 212 645 5156.

New Year's Eve at the Tunnel: The Tunnel takes over where the legendary Sound Factory left off and is hoping to become a cult club, with a two- storey DJ booth built for Junior Vasquez.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Danny Tenaglia and Tricky spin house music and trip hop for an up-town and down-town crowd.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/9pm-midday; 220 12th Avenue, at 27th St; $30 (pounds 18.50) in advance only (tickets on sale from Monday).

Ticket hotline: 001 212 695 2963.

Studio 54: The Legend Returns: Whether this will be the coolest New York event since the infamous Seventies disco closed, or just a tired re-working of its heyday is anyone's guess. But if you're going to New York, find out for yourself.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: Michael Dominico plays Seventies and Eighties favourites to a new generation.

When? Where? How Much?: 31 December/8pm-8am; 54th Street, between 5th and 6th Avenue; $125 (pounds 77) in advance only.

Ticket hotline: 001 212 353 1600.

Nell's New Year's Eve: Nell's is part-owned by Little Nell of Rocky Horror Picture Show fame and it's still one of the classiest clubs in West Village. Price includes champagne toast, party favours and other treats.

DJs, Sound & Crowd: DJ Jimmy spins everything from house to reggae and classic soul to a laid-back range of people. The Teddy B Allstars play R&B, soul and funk live.

When? Where? How Much?: 9pm-4am; 246 West 14th St; $40 (pounds 25) until 2am/$20 (12.50) after.

Ticket hotline: 001 212 675 1567.