‘It really feels like the odds are stacked against us’: Meet the married couples kept apart by coronavirus

As visa centres closed across the world during the pandemic, couples found themselves separated by thousands of miles – and a lot of red tape. Nicola Kelly talks to those desperate to be together again

Sara hasn't seen her husband for three months

It’s been more than three months since Sara saw her husband, Omar*, and the cracks in their marriage have started to appear.

“He’s started to withdraw from me, he just seems so depressed,” she says. “He’s calling less, and when he does, he barely asks how me and our two-year-old daughter are. It’s heartbreaking. How are we supposed to live when there’s only a bit of hope left?”

In February, shortly before the national lockdown started, Omar was granted a 30-day vignette – a month-long window to travel from his home country of Morocco to the UK – but two days before he was due to fly out, bags packed, the flight was cancelled. His entry vignette has since expired and the couple have had no information about the status of his application.

“We know nothing,” Sara says. “We don’t know when lockdown will be lifted in the UK or in Morocco, or when the visa centres will reopen. We don’t know how long it will take to reissue a vignette. And we don’t know when flights will resume. It has caused so much upset and distress for us.”

“I feel like I’m being punished for being a British citizen who works and pays their taxes, but who happened to fall in love with someone from outside the UK,” she adds. “All I ever wanted was for my family to be together but due to all of this the chances now seem very low.”

Since the coronavirus lockdown began over two months ago, visa processing centres have halted their operations. Already separated due to border closures and international flight restrictions, many couples say they have had limited information from the visa centres in-country about the status of their application. Some have had their passports held for months at a time, making a reunion with their families impossible. In some cases, this has led to a deterioration in the mental health of those affected.

“We are really struggling emotionally now,” says Gokhan, 34, who married his wife Leah, 28, two years ago in Bahrain. “We have both suffered from panic attacks and severe anxiety, made worse by worries about Covid. This is the time when we need to be together most. That’s all we need, nothing more.”

Leah is currently working as a teacher, earning a sufficient salary to meet the government’s £18,600 minimum income requirement to qualify for a spousal visa, but she is concerned their savings will soon run out due to the fees associated with the application. All their money has gone towards a visa that is now stuck in stasis; if it gets rejected, they’ll lose it all.

“We kept aside so much of our money for this, over the years,” she explains. “I have been struggling here in the UK to keep a roof over my head and food in the fridge and now we don’t know if that money has all gone. That could be £4,000, gone.

All I ever wanted was for my family to be together but the chances now seem very low

“I don’t understand why, when flights from Turkey to the UK have resumed, we cannot be together. It really feels like the odds are stacked against us.”

Campaigner Caroline Coombs from charity Reunite Families UK says the challenges families face at the moment are particularly difficult amid concerns about coronavirus.

“Now is the first semblance for the majority of people of what our families feel like over extended periods of time: not being able to hug or kiss goodnight and having to do all that over a screen.

“But while the end is in sight for a lot of families, this is the ‘new normal’ for those we work with. It’s just another level of uncertainty, another level of anxiety – it’s so destructive. They want to be on the right side of the law. They want a normal life. They just want to be a family.”

Added to the lack of information surrounding the reunion process, many fear that job insecurity may elongate their separation.

Sonia, 21, has been separated from her Iranian husband, Afshin, for a year. The couple have seen each other once since their wedding day. She is currently studying to become an engineer and has been furloughed from her paid work.

“I’m worried I can’t afford to help get him over to the UK now,” she says. “I might have to cancel the application and I don’t know if I’ll get a refund. Also, flights between the UK and Iran are still grounded and we have heard nothing. We have been left totally in the dark.

“What I would say to anyone is: imagine having your loved one in another country during a pandemic, imagine the families hit by the worldwide economic crisis and those in the furlough scheme. It’s impossible, this situation. We are human beings, we just want to be happy together.”

Leah and Gokhan have suffered from anxiety since being separated

Coombs says the costs are a particular concern for many families.

“The fees are astronomical,” she says. “The biometrics, the health surcharge, the legal fees, the translation costs… And if the application is refused, the Home Office keeps all the money. They always say it’s done on a case-by-case basis, but it’s not. It’s very questionable operational behaviour.”

Nazek Ramadan, director of charity Migrant Voice, agrees that the forced separation of families is an overlooked issue amid the Covid-19 crisis.

How are we supposed to live when there’s only a bit of hope left?

“Many of us are facing long periods of separation from our families right now – but for families going through the spouse visa process, it’s 10 times worse,” Ramadan says. “They’ve already had to live as ‘Skype families’ for months or years, to save the money they need for the application, to gather documents and pass tests. For them, this pandemic is a cruel twist of fate.

“We want to see the government showing genuine flexibility in these cases, not punishing families for situations beyond their control, for income lost or flights missed due to the pandemic. We want to see them working with these families to make sure they can be reunited as soon as possible.”

A Home Office spokesperson said: “The health and safety of staff and customers is our priority, which is why we are taking a measured approach to reopening visa application centres in line with the social distancing guidelines both in the UK and overseas.”

But for those families separated by border closures, grounded flights and limited information about a visa application decision, all they can do is wait in hope for a letter that will determine whether their futures will be lived together or apart.

* Names have been changed