I was doing a geographical: I needed to change me – not my location

As Charlotte Cripps sat on a sun lounger in Mauritius, her past seemed like a distant horror film – until the last night of her break

(Illustration by Amara May)

We arrive in the hotel room – and all I can see is a massive bed. At least Alex will be there in the morning, I think, as he unpacks his holiday wardrobe. Is he going to wear a budgie smuggler? A bit like the way dogs look like their owners, I think swimwear gives a lot away about a man. I’m impressed to see he has a tasteful pair of swimming shorts – a bit flamboyant like his personality.

To my horror, I notice this room has an extremely intimate glass-walled bathroom and when you switch on the light, it is totally transparent. It has rose petal confetti strewn everywhere, but how can I go to the toilet without him seeing me? I call the concierge and say quietly as Alex is on the balcony that I’m not happy with the completely exposed bathroom – but he tells me all the rooms are the same.

Soon the bathroom worries are a thing of the past as we are completely at ease with each other in our new luxury retreat. Alex has his headphones on quite a lot and takes phone calls loudly – doing deals poolside with a long icy lemonade in hand. But it’s a damn sight better than the last family holiday in Egypt where I had a punch up with my sister Rebecca in the hotel foyer.