Lyric sheets Jackson versus Cocker 1997/8/9

Martin Newell
Friday 01 March 1996 00:02 GMT
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The Jackson versus Cocker case defied imagination

In the last years of the Nineties when it ended in elation

Leaving lawyers and accountants comatose for the duration

Having smashed existing records for the longest litigation

It was televised and serialised and beamed up to a nation

Who were paralysed with gratitude and loss of concentration

The foppish adversaries sat in hostile indignation

As their champions thrust or parried this or that denunciation

But undoubtedly the thing which most prolonged the situation

Was the hundred child witnesses thrown into the equation

The presence of a chimpanzee caused further complication

While the crowded public gallery was moist with adoration

Parliament was dragged in when the case for mitigation

Called for Prescott, Blair and Bottomley to add corroboration

But the single biggest factor which preceded culmination

Was the lawyer's needing money and the threat of sequestration

So the pettish two protagonists forgot their disputation

Then divided up the film rights and went out for a libation

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