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Dom Joly

@domjoly

Dom Joly is a comedian, travel writer and former columnist for The Independent

“How did you get a newspaper column?” is a question I am often asked by people who assume I’m illiterate
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How do you get a newspaper column? Wine helped for me

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Poolside with the Pulitzer crowd at the Dubai Literary Festival

"There is nothing that you can go and see a doctor about that doesn’t end up with them asking you to strip to your pants"
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Why can't I visit my doctor without being asked to strip to my pants?

In the various sorts of sand fly only the female is responsible for biting and sucking blood, as she requires the protein to make her eggs
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Sand flies, machetes – it’s a jungle out there in Panama

The Panama Canal is used by over 13,000 ships every year
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Panama is rather gorgeous, but keep it under your hat

Migrants seeking to cross into the US wait in a pickup truck close to the US-Mexican border in Sonora, Mexico
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I have the utmost respect for illegal immigrants, especially now

"Huxley had been part of our family since just after the birth of our first child"
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Farewell Huxley, elder statesman and friend

"On day one I was woken at the crack of dawn and told to saddle up"
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Yee-ha! I’m unleashing my inner cowboy

The rather swanky Mandarin Oriental in Las Vegas
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What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas (good!)

"It’s impossible not to feel both paranoid and defensive when being probed by a shrink"
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Pity the psychiatrists working for reality television shows

Donald Trump
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Donald Trump has all the attributes of a potential dictator

Festivus is a holiday celebrated by those seeking an alternative to the commercialism and pressures of the Christmas holiday season
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Toronto cabbies are very friendly - unless they're French Canadian

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Man-flu can be hardest on your nearest and dearest

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Man-flu can be hardest on your nearest and dearest

"I love the concept of Christmas. It’s the reality that disappoints"
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Ho, ho, no! Joly by name, not by nature

Lady Colin Campbell reportedly quit the ITV show after suffering a fall in the jungle
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Lady C’s grumble in the jungle takes me back

'Hopkins is a controversialist, and therefore not worth arguing with'
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Making fun of Katie Hopkins? That’s my job!

North Koreans attending a military funeral in Pyongyang earlier this month
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North Korea is an ideal 'safe' destination for your next holiday

North Koreans attending a military funeral in Pyongyang earlier this month
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North Korea is an ideal 'safe' destination for your next holiday

The Varaita Valley, in the region of Piedmont
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How to get a mention in my good hotel guide

Wilbur the pig's local profile has soared
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I'm seriously worried Wilbur has become the Justin Bieber of pigs

"At about three in the afternoon I got the three-line whip call to join them. “We’re in Hyde Park ….” My wife sounded suicidal"
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The heart-warming joy when your children disown you

Speed Awareness Courses are only offered if the driver hasn't been convicted of any other speeding offences in the past three years
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I am ‘speed aware’, and can share my wisdom

"Real life must be a disappointment to my son. Why bother going out when a far more exciting world awaits on screen?"
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My son’s online a lot... how did that happen?

Comment

Thanks, Jeremy, for letting sleeping pigs lie

"I tried to shield Wilbur...but pigs are smart and he sensed that something was up. I eventually had to sit him down and tell him the whole story"
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My pig is upset, and I think we all know why

El Al is the Israeli national airline
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How do find you find the El Al check-in? Just look for armed police

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Thanks, Jeremy, for letting sleeping pigs lie

"I tried to shield Wilbur...but pigs are smart and he sensed that something was up. I eventually had to sit him down and tell him the whole story"
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My pig is upset, and I think we all know why

El Al is the Israeli national airline
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How do find you find the El Al check-in? Just look for armed police

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Why Israeli airports and comedians don't mix

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Why Israeli airports and comedians don't mix

Workers clean the area in front of the new Turkish Presidential Palace prior to an official reception for Republic day in Ankara
Comment

Up Ankara, for a tour of great crapital cities

Commentators

We're Brits abroad (but keep it under your hat)

Comment

Festivals: Headlining the main stage - Mr Nobody

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Festivals: Headlining the main stage - Mr Nobody

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Festivals: Headlining the main stage - Mr Nobody

"There is only one thing better than being an Englishman who is into cricket when England are doing well in the Ashes. That “thing” is to have an Australian around to give some stick to."
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The perfect summer is England doing well in the Ashes while you have

"Cyclists are a particularly angry and self-righteous bunch"
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Two wheels good, everybody else bad, if you listen to cyclists...

Roger Hodgson performing on stage at Bluesfest 2013 in Byron Bay, Australia
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I had the chance to introduce the lead singer of Supertramp, but not

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Wilbur's Hollywood career is taking off. There are rumblings of a Babe

Wilbur, the pig who thinks he's a dog (Dom Joly)
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My hilarious pet pig Wilbur is more popular than I am — so I'll let

Seville, Plaza de los Venerables
Americas

Dom Joly's family Geocaching treasure hunt in Spain and Portugal

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Before summer's joys can begin we must go through the ordeal of school

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An American documentary show is coming to visit - and I'm planning on

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Kate Moss is following my flying example - and going economy class

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Corruption at the heart of Fifa 15: Can someone stop my son being

Test Match Special broadcasters Phil Tufnell and Jonathan Agnew
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Maybe it's a good thing Desert Island Discs has said no again. I'm not

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Maybe it's a good thing Desert Island Discs has said no again. I'm not

Test Match Special broadcasters Phil Tufnell and Jonathan Agnew
Dom Joly

It’s my party, and I’ll lie if I want to...

Handy tips: Dom Joly (left) in a promotional image for Trigger Happy TV
News

How not to make the big time: Dom Joly shares 39 lessons from his

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A peek inside the mind of the artist at work

Nigel Farage decided to stand down after he was unable to win in Thanet South
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I returned to Britain to find parties without leaders and unseated MPs

Nigel Farage decided to stand down after he was unable to win in Thanet South
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I returned to Britain to find parties without leaders and unseated MPs

Up and away: hot air balloons in Warstein, Germany
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Hot air balloons: Try to avoid screaming like a baby as you soar up to

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Beach research – I do it so you don't have to

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Life's a beach, then you jump off a racing boat

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On our road trip around the Iberian peninsula I took in my first

It was Holy Friday in Spain (AFP/Getty)
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In Granada, we saw the march of the pointy-hatted sinners

It was Holy Friday in Spain (AFP/Getty)
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In Granada, we saw the march of the pointy-hatted sinners

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My genius new format for a revamped Top Gear

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My holiday plan: mucho ham and no museums

The Cheltenham Festival takes over the Cotswolds town every March
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A week spent keeping a safe distance from the hideous hurly-burly of

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Since announcing that I have bought a hot-air balloon, the offers are

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Purchasing a balloon has seen my love of hot air reach new heights

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Purchasing a balloon has seen my love of hot air reach new heights

The Courchevel 1850 ski resort in the French Alps
Columnists

Don't mention the war in ski-lift argy-bargy

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Heather Cho's air rage is as nothing next to dog walker's ire

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I thought snowboarding was something my kids should aspire to, but

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Don't copy my mistakes, kids, make your own

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Don't copy my mistakes, kids, make your own

Controversial TV personality Katie Hopkins
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Detoxing and Katie Hopkins make for a deadly cocktail

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Castrating a pig would be simple, you'd think, but Wilbur is one

Comment

Paris attacks: Twitter's not a place to make bad news better

Comment

Driving abroad? First you must fill your boot

Kim Jong-un is the subject of an assassination attempt as part of the plot of 'The Interview' (AFP)
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The Interview and Kim Jong-un farce is no laughing matter

Comment

For once, Kerry Katona had the right idea

Comment

On tour with the Sri Lankan Walter Mitty

Comment

Ups and downs at the world's tallest building

Comment

Pet hate: Wilbur gets the rough edge of Roo's tongue

Comment

I've tried reason, but my cat is pig-ignorant

Comment

In cyberspace, no one can hear you scream: The plight of a BT 'fast'

Comment

Bonfire Night? It drives me crackers

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Halloween? It's just another day at the office

Nick Clegg was one of the first politicians I’ve met who I could imagine having a meal with
Dom Joly

I'm not ashamed to admit Nick Clegg agrees with me

Comment

When did Donald Trump become a statesman?

Love doesn't always take two: Grace Gelder (not pictured) married herself)
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Marrying yourself – a good idea, up to a point

Nick Clegg was one of the first politicians I’ve met who I could imagine having a meal with
Dom Joly

I'm not ashamed to admit Nick Clegg agrees with me

Comment

When did Donald Trump become a statesman?

Love doesn't always take two: Grace Gelder (not pictured) married herself)
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Marrying yourself – a good idea, up to a point

Comment

I know what my wife's up to... (I think)

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My legs say stop, but my arm says go for it

The Arch Duke arrives in Sarajevo
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War is hell, and so was my tour of Sarajevo

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Seizing passports is a dangerous departure

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Dom Joly: No menu! Dining doesn't get posher than this

Cool for cabs: New York City’s celebrated yellow taxis
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These days New York is quieter, but its cabbies are louder

Lake Huron Shoreline in the Bruce Peninsula Shari Chambers
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Dom Joly: To the frontier of knowledge, on an inflatable

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Wildlife spotting for the bearly sighted in the Canadian tundra

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