Weekly Muse
Your support helps us to tell the story
From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.
At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.
The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.
Your support makes all the difference.The summer of St Luke has gone
And so have several daylight hours
As Fireworks Fortnight reigns again
The trembling collie keens and cowers.
Sombre news for goats this week
Both native and Norwegian
Our Government spends 30 grand
Or something in that region
On parchment made of goatskin
Which they use to print those tracts
Better known to most of us
As Parliamentary Acts.
Now vellum, as the paper's called
When rendered to condition,
Requires the skin of many goats
As per the old tradition.
And from the Magna Carta
To the very latest charter
The humble goat has proved to be
A veritable martyr.
An end to years of cruelty
Was rejected in a vote
The House was offered paper
But they voted for the goat.
In spite of MPs' shunting
Through a future Bill on hunting
Then railing at defiance
By the Countryside Alliance
They draft their laws on goatskin
But do not perceive the link.
To call it nanny government
Is closer than we think.
I action as a parent
And I parent as an action
As I hear my language languish
In a state of stupefaction.
But the problem gaining access
When I access information
Is that nouns and verbs reversing
Impact on the situation.
So since you've come to visit
You can impact on that settle
And I'll action cups of coffee
When I've accessed mugs and kettle.
Her name is Tasty Tamsin
And her chest is far from flat
Page-Three Stunna (Hubba hubba)
Looka da brains on that.
But now the The Sun is turning
From a 30-year tradition
They want more women readers
And the paper's in transition.
So goodbye Tasty Tamsin
And farewell to tit'n'bum?
"The minute there's a sales glitch,"
Says Murdoch, "back they come."
Keith Richards up for breakfast?
Well the chance was fairly bleak
But there he was at Q's Awards
One afternoon this week.
He squinted in the sunlight
As he groaned across at Ron:
"The lights are very bright tonight
How long have we been on?"
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
Comments