Love Island 2021 review: Even Brad’s god-like looks can’t save Lucinda from his terrible chat

The L word in week two! Can you believe it?

Does anyone remember The Truman Show? Set in the fictional town of Seahaven Island, Truman gradually becomes more aware that his life is a farce, and that his entire lived reality is the plot of a meta TV show beamed out into the world. Though our islanders are acutely conscious of their TV stardom, like Truman, the cogs are beginning to turn as they realise something is not quite right in paradise. The problem? A looming recoupling on the horizon.

Deeply aware that their time on the island might be limited, our contestants are moving mad in a quest to secure their place in the villa. For Brad, this means pledging devotion to new girl Lucinda, who seems to be getting cold feet. You know it’s bad when three women separately come to the realisation that Brad’s God-like looks are not enough to make up for his lack in conversational abilities. This is a man whose magical qualities include summoning the YouTube playlist “LoFi Hip Hop Beats to Relax/Study to” whenever he opens his mouth. Blinkered by his own abs, our himbo King has no awareness of the impact of his terrible chat, instead, living in a world of blissful ignorance, where new blonde women drop from the sky and fall in love with him. To be fair, he’s only half wrong.

But Brad isn’t the only islander hell bent on securing a place in the villa. You have to respect a woman who so brazenly does not give a f***. This is where we find ourselves with Chloe, who following last night’s antics, must carry the knowledge of her and Toby’s secret kiss. I say this as if there is any kind of burden to this knowledge, when actually there is none. Though Toby had the decency to at least look like he was haunted by guilt, the “agony” of their tryst was quickly passed around the villa, Chloe and her “naughty trio” of Lucinda and Millie gossiping about the incident on the Ibiza-sized sun loungers. I’m reluctant to label anyone the “villain” in this villa, but Chloe and Toby are making that very difficult, especially when contrasted against the powerhouse of grace, charisma, uniqueness and talent that is Kaz.

But what’s that sound, carried across the gentle Mallorcan breeze? Yes, it’s the abstinence-inspiring squelch of more snogging, as Jake and Liberty embarked upon their first date. After the arrival of the new girls put their relationship to the test, Jiberty are moving from strength to strength. Having endured two weeks of barely-there romance, it was heartening to see Jake openly share how he felt, moving beyond the laddish persona he’d quickly generated. Yet as Liberty confessed to Kaz that she might be falling in love (Yes, the L word, in week two! Can you believe it?) I couldn’t help but wonder whether this was the beginning of something beautiful, or a car crash waiting to happen.

We all know how quickly things can change in this villa, and I only hope that Liberty doesn’t live to regret putting all her eggs in Jake’s basket…