TOO MUCH, TOO YOUNG

Of the six million carers in Britain, 40,000 are children looking after parents who are alcoholics, epileptics, schizophrenics. Some are as young as five, many miss school. Here are their stories

JAMIE, who is 10 years old, lives with his single mother who is severely mentally ill and sometimes suicidal. When she is "bad", he shops for the family, cleans, cooks and looks after his younger brother and sister. He makes sure his mother takes her medication, and he manages the family budget. They live on state benefits.

At school, Jamie is bullied because his mother is mentally ill (though that's not the term his classmates use). Her behaviour is indeed disturbing - even for him, and he is used to it. Jamie finds it hard to concentrate at school and sometimes feels he can't leave his mother, so he misses school "quite a lot". Often it seems there is nowhere for him to turn. If he makes a fuss, he is terrified he or his brother and sister will be taken into care. If he draws attention to the demands of caring for his mother, perhaps - as they frequently tell him at school - the men in white coats will come for her.

Of the estimated six million carers in Britain, 40,000 are children like Jamie. Their average age is just 12. The most comprehensive study of young carers to date, produced by the Young Carers Research Group at Loughborough University and published by Community Care magazine, reveals that 42 per cent miss school, and 60 per cent are from single-parent families.

Some of these children are pictured opposite. While most 12-year-olds are at school, they are effectively working as carers in the community - and for free. These children are willing to look after those they love, but they have no choice. Why are they forced to cope alone when the social services could share the burden?

Until earlier this month, when new legislation took effect, the sticking point had been one of legal definition. Young carers could be classed as "in need" under the Children Act 1989, legally allowing social services to help them if they had the resources. But there is a world of difference between the services councils are "empowered" to provide, and those - such as child protection - that are their legal "duty". "If something is only a power," says one social worker, "it won't be done. If it's a duty, we think 'Thank God for that'. We know it will be done." But in practice, the needs of many child carers simply go unnoticed.

Under the new law, effective from 1 April, child and adult carers can demand an assessment of their own needs, which must then be taken into account when deciding what is to be done. But does the ponderously named Carers (Recognition and Services) Act 1995 necessarily help children like Jamie? They don't think of themselves as "young carers", or know what kind of help they can demand. Luke Clements, legal adviser to the Carers National Association points out: "The carer has to ask to be assessed, so they must already recognise themselves as carers and realise they have this right."

Even under the new legislation, the fears that prevent Jamie from seeking help will continue to do so. He'd never ask for help in front of his mother, for example, because it would show her up as someone who can't care for her children - and he'd hate her to think that he's had enough.

In the case of Cathy and Sean, social services did step in. Aged 14 and 12, they are now in foster care because of their mother's manic depression, which makes her unpredictable and sometimes violent. For many years, since their father left home, they cared for their mother. "Sometimes she didn't get up, or wouldn't get up," says Cathy. "She never woke us. We used to miss the school bus and there was no way of getting to school because she wouldn't give us the bus fare. Sometimes we were exhausted. If she'd been going for a few weeks, we wouldn't have had any sleep. She'd keep us up all night."

The worst time was a Christmas when their mother killed their dog, hamster and goldfish. Sean remembers when "she sprayed hair spray on her head and lit it. It was awful, all blistered."

One child as young as five is known to social workers as a young carer. More typical is Jason, eight, and looks after his mother who has epilepsy. He finds her fits distressing and has had to call ambulances for her, which frightened him. It is hard to wake his mother after a fit, and Jason knows very little about epilepsy. Once he got into bed with her and she had a fit, for which he blames himself. He is worried about what will happen to him if she has to go into hospital.

Children who care for parents with multiple sclerosis, epilepsy or stroke have a hard enough time. For the many who look after alcoholics, schizophrenics, the mentally ill or those who are HIV-positive or suffering from Aids, the social stigma of their parents' condition adds to their feeling of isolation. Often, looking after a sick parent can be a commitment that lasts years.

Christine, 17, has cared for her father since he had a heart attack and stroke when she was nine. She says having sole responsibility for her father has made her feel different from other children. "I don't mind doing my bit," she says. "I've no problem with cooking a meal, doing the washing, or the ironing to a certain extent. What I don't like is being expected to do it, being taken for granted and not having any choice - which I haven't had for years."

Wanting to help but feeling overwhelmed by responsibility is a common mix of feelings in young carers. They may dislike performing intimate tasks for a parent, yet realise it would be harder for the parent if a stranger took over.

"To help my dad I dress him, take him to the toilet and keep him warm," says one girl aged 12. "I listen for him in the night, give him medicines, watch him so he doesn't drop burning fags on the floor - he might set light to himself."

Christine, too, has cared intimately for her father. "I did stop showering him at 14 or 15, though recently that's started again. I didn't like showering him; I thought: 'I want my privacy, I'm sure he wants his.'"

Even under the new legislation, care in the community is being provided by children like these. Families are increasingly being asked to pay for services such as meals on wheels, home help and day centres. Many will decide it's not worth it, and rely on their children. With social services for sick, elderly and mentally ill people being rationed, assessments for young carers still may not mean they get the help they need. As Luke Clements says: "It's about resources. Without those we will find that the Carers Act is hardly worth the paper it's written on."

! All the children's names in this article have been changed. Polly Neate is deputy editor of 'Community Care' magazine.