Music: Lyric Sheets

Martin Newell
Friday 11 December 1998 01:02 GMT
Comments

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

People who are tired of Alanis Morissette's angst can now contact The Alanis Morissette Lyric Generator. This Internet device (www.brunching.com) allows the user to punch in their own emotional problems and have them set to Alanis's music.

Is it a paraffin greenhouse heater?

A moped fuelled on cow excreta?

How many miles will it do to a litre?

Alanis Morissette

Is it a portable trouser-press?

A seventeenth-century birthing dress?

A Luxembourgian water cress?

Alanis Morissette

A caravan no longer sold?

A French Canadian wrestling hold?

A fridge which keeps bacteria cold?

Alanis Morissette

No. Alanis Morissette

Is like the sort of noise you get

While waiting with a wounded pet

Before arrival of the vet.

It rants, it rails, it shrieks and squeals

And while your tooth enamel peels

It tells you how fed-up it feels

Alanis Morissette

Like Joni Mitchell's spoilt niece

or something out on day-release

Too much of it, you call the police

Alanis Morissette

When fifth-form angst as poetry

Meets well-paid music therapy

You get the lot on one CD

Alanis Morissette

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in