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Your support makes all the difference.The Hobbit: the Battle of the Five Armies (12) Peter Jackson DVD/Blu-ray (144mins)
Bunnies pulling sleds, orcs on giant hogs, elves on elks… This final slice of Tolkien is too silly and too baffling but thankfully not too long. It effectively consists of two lengthy, meticulously choreographed dust-ups between a dragon (Benedict Cumberbatch) and brave Bard (Lee Evans), and between some dwarves, elves and orcs. Scenes are not allowed to pass without Howard Shore’s cloying, ceaselessly ominous score (or that irritating “Shire” music), but Martin Freeman’s reputation remarkably survives intact as stoical Bilbo. You hope it’s the end, but Peter Jackson might keep on flogging a dead orc yet.
***
Big Eyes (12) Tim Burton DVD/Blu-ray (106mins)
“You’re better than spare change, you shouldn’t sell yourself so cheap,” maintains Walter Keane (Christoph Waltz), a real estate salesman and supposed part-time painter, who gets his creepy hooks into Margaret (Amy Adams) a single mother struggling to sell her “big eyes” paintings in 1950s San Francisco. However, when a sozzled customer pays for one of Margaret’s artworks in a jazz club, the opportunistic Walter quickly takes credit for it. Soon the paintings become a sensation and glum Margaret is churning them out for her greedy husband. Tim Burton’s admirably restrained true-life, art-fraud drama is blessed with a nuanced central performance from Adams, who makes any film she’s in better.
***
Midnight Run on Blu-ray (18) Martin Brest Blu-ray (126mins)
Rarely has the chemistry between the two male leads been as gratifying as the one between Robert De Niro’s grumpy bounty hunter and Charles Grodin’s crooked accountant in this sensationally entertaining, profanity-ridden comedy thriller from 1988 (above). George Gallo’s script is crisp and funny, but it’s the acting (especially from Grodin, an expert at the bone-dry one-liner) that wins you over in this endlessly rewatchable gem.
*****
Tinkerbell & the Legend of the Neverbeast (U) Steve Loter DVD/Blu-ray (73mins)
Tinks rampages villages for fairy dust and imposes martial law... no, she doesn’t. Instead, she mainly steps aside for the animal fairy, Fawn, who wants to domesticate a wild cat-creature in this sluggish sixth Tinkerbell “adventure” from Disney. My five-year-old daughter – the film’s target audience – gave it three stars; not a ringing endorsement.
**
The Offence on Blu-ray (15) Sidney Lumet Blu-ray (112mins)
A distorted soundtrack, pointless use of slow-mo and some baffling visuals don’t make Sidney Lumet’s crime-drama an easy watch. Sean Connery plays a tormented detective sergeant who has to face up to his demons when interrogating Ian Bannen’s suspected child molester. The interrogation scene between Connery and Bannen is the highlight of this testing and cult British feature from 1972.
**
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