The 5-minute Interview: Pam Ayres, Poet, sketch writer and performer
'I'm not a politician, but if I were I would resign immediately'
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Your support makes all the difference.Pam Ayres was born in Oxfordshire and began writing as a member of the Women's Royal Air Force, but it wasn't until her 1975 performance on TV's "Opportunity Knocks" that she began to write professionally. In 1996 she was given her own show on Radio 2, as well as a series of slots on Radio 4. Her DVD, "Pam Ayres Unsupported", is out now
If I weren't talking to you right now I'd be...
Putting together some performances for next week. I'm doing one speech and one normal show. It should make an interesting evening.
A common misperception of me is...
That my solo show is one poem after another. It's much more than that.
I wish people would take more notice of...
I am extremely happy because, professionally, things are very nice at the moment. I've got a series of performances and people taking lots of notice.
The most surprising thing that happened to me was...
I was never very keen on having a family, so the most surprising thing is that when I did I went crackers and became intensely maternal.
A phrase I use far too often is...
"Do you know what I mean?" It must be very irritating for other people.
I am not a politician, but...
If I were I would resign immediately.
I'm good at...
Writing my kind of material. It makes me laugh and it makes me happy.
I'm very bad at...
Being organised. I reluctantly live in chaos. I would love to be organised but I live in muddles and I hate that about myself. I have heaps of stuff.
The ideal night out is...
A night at the pictures. In Australia they have a lot of cinemas with enormous, comfy armchairs. There was one place that had little tables and a cafe with a wood-burning pizza oven. You could just put your feet up. It was a nice way to spend an evening. I'm not much enthused by long, drawn-out, fancy meals. I would just like to have a glass of wine with my husband.
In moments of weakness I...
Make lots of lists and tick them off. I think it was Nancy Astor who said: "I never wait until I'm in a particular mood to do something, because that way you never achieve anything." Lists are good for you.
You know me as a writer but in another life I'd have been...
Growing things. I'd have a plant nursery and then move into farming. I've always had a vegetable garden.
The best age to be is...
This is a good age (60). I'm not lacking confidence, but I have a gorgeous family. I know I've had more time than I'm going to get.
In a nutshell, my philosophy is this:
I'm not sure I've got one. Maybe: "Count your blessings." I know it sounds really corny, but I do believe in it.
Alice-Azania Jarvis
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