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Ne-Yo walks back apology to LGBTQ community as he doubles down on criticism about gender-affirming healthcare

‘I need you all to hear this from the horse’s mouth, not the publicist’s computer,’ singer says on Instagram

Amber Raiken
New York
Tuesday 08 August 2023 23:32 BST
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Ne-Yo takes back apology for comments against allowing children to transition

Ne-Yo has taken back his apology to the LGBTQ+ community, as he doubled down on his criticism about gender-affirming healthcare.

The singer, 43, shared a video to Instagram on 7 August to retract his statement, in which he expressed his “deepest apologies” to the LGBTQ+ community, after he criticised parents who allowed their children to make “life-changing decisions” about their genders. The critcism first came from an interview with Vlad TV on 5 August, when he compared children exploring their gender identity to a situation where a child asked their parents for candy.

In the clip posted to his Instagram on Monday, he made a clarification about his apology, seemingly hinting that he’s not the one who wrote it. He also noted that he wouldn’t apologise for sharing his thoughts about gender identity, as a father of seven children.

​​“I need you all to hear this from the horse’s mouth, not the publicist’s computer,” he said. “First and foremost, I do not apologise for having an opinion on this matter. I’m a 43-year-old heterosexual man raising five boys and two girls. That’s my reality. If my opinion offended somebody, then, yeah, sure, I apologise because my intention isn’t to offend anybody.”

The musician – whose real name is Shaffer Chimere Smith – noted that he’s still “entitled to feel how [he] feels,” just like his followers are entitled to “feel how [they] feel”. He specified that he hasn’t been concerned about people “following” or “agreeing” with him, as he was simply answering a question he was asked during the Vlad TV interview.

He continued the video by noting that he has “no beef” with the LGBTQ+ community, before encouraging viewers to do “what they want” with their children. However, he still defended his initial opinion, where he questioned if it was a “good idea” for children to have access to gender affirming procedures.

“I will never be OK with allowing a child to make a decision that detrimental to their life,” he said. “I definitely plan to educate myself a little bit more on this matter. However, I doubt that there is any book anywhere or any opinion that somebody’s gonna tell me that’s gonna make me OK with letting a child make a decision like that.”

In the caption, the “So Sick” singer emphasised that he would not be “bullied into apologising for having an opinion”. He once again noted that his “intention is never to offend anybody”, before explaining how he’d felt if one of his children decided that they wanted to transition.

“If one of my seven kids were to decide that he or she wanted to be something other than what they were born as, once they’re old enough and mature enough to make that decision…so be it,” he wrote. “Not gonna love em’ any less. Daddy is still Daddy and he loves you regardless. But this isn’t even a discussion until they are MENTALLY MATURE ENOUGH to have such a discussion. Period. Point blank.”

Ne-Yo is the father of seven: as he shares two, Madilyn, 12, and Mason, 11, with ex-fiancée Monyetta Shaw, and three – Shaffer, seven, Roman, five, and Isabella, two – with ex-wife Crystal Renay. He also shares two sons: Braiden, who was born in 2021, and  Brixton, who was born in February, with ex Sadé Jenea, according toPage Six.

In the caption of his Instagram post, he concluded: “Y’all do y’all, imma do me and we can agree to disagree and coexist PEACEFULLY. LOVE IS THE ONLY TRUE POWER.”

On 5 August, Ne-Yo first made headlines when he said that while he had “no problems” with the LGBTQ+ community, he “personally came from an era where a man was a man and a woman was a woman, and it wasn’t but two genders”.

“You could identify as a goldfish if you like, I don’t care. That ain’t my business. It becomes my business when you try to make me play the game with you. I’m not gonna call you a goldfish. But if you wanna be a goldfish, you go be a goldfish,” he said during his interview on Vlad TV.

He then claimed that parents “have almost forgotten what their role as a parent is,” before questioning adults’ involvement when children decided to transition, and get gender affirming procedures.

“OK, if your little boy comes to you and says, ‘Daddy, I want to be a girl,’ and you just let him rock with that, you just let … he’s five,” he said. “If you let this 5-year-old boy decide to eat candy all day, he’s gonna do that. When did it become a good idea to let a five-year-old, let a six-year-old, let a 12-year-old make a life-changing decision for themselves? When did that happen?”

Although his apology has been retracted, Ne-Yo initially took to X – formerly known as Twitter – on 6 August to address the remarks that he made on Vlad TV. At the time, his caption of the post started off with: “I’d like to express my deepest apologies…”

His statement went on to read: “After much reflection, I’d like to express my deepest apologies to anyone that I may have hurt with my comments on parenting and gender identity. I’ve always been an advocate for love and inclusivity in the LGBTQ+ community, so I understand how my comments could’ve been interpreted as insensitive and offensive.”

The musician noted that “gender identity is nuanced” and that he could “honestly admit that [he] plans to better educate [himself] on the topic,” in order to “approach future conversations with more empathy”.

He concluded: “At the end of the day, I lead with love and support everyone’s freedom of expression and pursuit of happiness.”

The Independent has contacted representatives for Ne-Yo for comment.

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