Man sues women in ‘Are We Dating the Same Guy?’ Facebook group over negative reviews about him

Popular Facebook group ‘Are We Dating the Same Guy?’ allows members to check for ‘red flags’ in the person they’re interested in dating

A man has filed a lawsuit over negative posts shared about dating him in the “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook group.

Nikko D’Ambrosio, who filed the lawsuit on 11 January in the District Court for the Northern District of Illinois, claimed in the lawsuit that he had been the subject of defamation, doxxing, and privacy invasion, and that the statements in the Facebook group have affected his reputation, according to court documents obtained by Today.

D’Ambrosio is suing 27 women, one man, Meta, and other social media companies for over $75,000 in damages.

The popular “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook group allows members to check whether the person they’re interested in is already dating someone else. As the Facebook group has grown and spawned local chapters, from New York City to Chicago, some women have used the group to ask for what are essentially user reviews of the men they are considering dating, often alongside a screengrab of a dating app profile.

The Chicago subgroup, which has more than 80,000 members, describes itself as a “place for women to protect, support, and empower other women” and “not judging men”.

In the complaint, D’Ambrosio alleged that the defendants had posted “provably false and defamatory” statements about their dating experiences with him. He claimed that posts in the group led to “personal humiliation, mental anguish and suffering, emotional distress, stress, anxiety” and unspecified lost earnings.

According to the lawsuit, D’Ambrosio claimed that one woman allegedly posted a photo of him in the group. The complaint included screenshots of multiple Facebook users inquiring if there was any “tea” or red flags they should know about “Nikko, 32”.

He stated that several women in the comments referred to him as a “psycho” and “very clingy”, with one accusing him of ghosting her after they slept together. He reportedly contacted the defendants around 15 December 2023 to ask that statements made about him be removed from the group, but the post was removed and later uploaded again anonymously.

The Chicago man also alleged that thousands of men have been “potentially defamed” and that statements made by the Facebook group “anonymously dox, defame, and attack the moral character of men they’ve met online”.

“Thousands of men have been potentially defamed by members of the group via these online publications, and remain entirely unaware of the attacks on their character as a result of the social media group’s private status and heavily moderated members list,” the suit stated.

D’Ambrosio is seeking compensatory damages, punitive damages and compensation for his attorney’s fees.

In a statement to CBS, his attorneys denied that D’Ambrosio sent the messages to the women named in the suit. “We’ve been working on this for several months. We’ve tried everything but sue these people. We tried sending them registered letters, sending them cease-and-desist letters - to no avail,” said attorney Daniel Nikolic. “Ultimately, we had to go take this recourse because our hand was forced, and it wouldn’t take down these posts.”

“Our client’s a victim. He’s a victim on this matter,” said attorney Marc Trent. “We want to stop there from being additional victims in the future.”

The Independent has contacted Meta for comment.